


In Plain Sight

by yukiscorpio



Category: The Last Remnant
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-21
Updated: 2014-01-21
Packaged: 2018-01-09 13:13:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 31,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1146416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yukiscorpio/pseuds/yukiscorpio
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>David was presented with a chance to put everything right again - but how?</p><p>A post-game, "where is Rush now?" story.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Originally published on LJ in Aug-Sep 2009.

_"So it's come to this," the woman said when everything fell apart. There was no malice in her voice, nor was there pain, but there seemed to be a small sigh of relief._

_They could not be so easily separated, but still, when the shockwave hit them, she tried to let David go, only to change her mind and tighten her grip after a moment. It was the only thing she could do; the power would have destroyed David otherwise._

_At the very moment when everything disappeared, David saw a small boy in the centre of the chaos, reaching out for him._

 

Rush was the type of person who could make friends anywhere. From nobilities to the Silver Falcons, from Third Committee members to infamous bandits, he captured the hearts of the people he met with ease, as if it came to him as naturally as breathing. He talked about them like they had been friends since years ago, and his sincerity made them treat him with the same.

After Rush left, some of these people - the ones who could go near Athlum Castle without being arrested or at least questioned - came to see David. David received them in a private setting, though there was little for them to talk about. He could not look at them in the eye, just as he could not really look at Irina ever since they left Elysion. He was the one who failed them. Had he been faster, had he fought harder, perhaps they could have killed the Conqueror without that machine spinning into action and Rush would not have had to make that sacrifice.

Rush's friends didn't seem to mind, though, and invited him to what they called a small party, where they were going to gather around and toast to Rush's memory. Thinking he might not be able to handle such an occasion, David declined, but thanked them from the bottom of his heart for the invitation, for thinking of him and not shun him for his status or his involvement in Rush's departure.

But when the date of the meet up drew near, he changed his mind. He wanted to meet the people who saw Rush as their closest friend, just as he did. He wanted to hear their stories about Rush.

So when the night finally arrived, he put on his plainest clothes and left the castle on his own, aware that he was being irresponsible but also that Torgal's subordinates, if not Torgal himself, must be following him. All under the name of protection, of course, but David knew the true intent, which Torgal could deny as much as he wanted. David was never going to become what his father once was, and therefore he would never have Torgal's complete trust. That was fine; over the past five years David had learned how to play this game.

The night was warm, humid. Summer was almost in full swing. Still, David ensured the cloak concealed his hair and most of his face, since it really would not do for the Lord of Athlum to be seen wandering the dark streets alone. The address David was given was in Virtus Parish, an area he knew well. After he passed under the archway that led into the area, he paused, then very casually turned around.

There Torgal was, some twenty feet away, the moonlight casting an elongated shadow of him on the ground, even longer than his already superior height, like something that came out of a nightmare. After the initial surprise, Torgal started to walk closer, opening his mouth to speak, but at that moment David turned around and continued to walk. If Torgal insisted on following, then he could assume permission had been granted. Sometimes David had to tighten the leash, other times he had to let it slacken. This was the best, and the only, way to deal with Torgal. It wasn't to say that David hated Torgal, not at all, but the very person who still saw him as a child was the one who would not allow him the room to grow.

But tonight wasn't about Torgal.

David arrived at the address a little later than he ought to. There were around fifteen people in the house, men and women of all races, some of whom David knew personally because of Rush, others only by reputation, and a few who were complete strangers to him. His arrival caused a lull in the conversation, but when he pulled off the hood of his cloak and they recognised him, there were delighted smiles and offers of food and alcohol.

Sitting around on sofas, cushions and rugs, a fire crackling in the background, each person talked about their meeting with Rush, sharing their memories of him. There was a lot of laughter as well as a few tears. David sipped at his dangerously alcoholic drink as he listened, knowing the burning sensation in his chest had nothing to do with what he was drinking at all.

When it was David's turn to speak, he could not find the words, or the strength. His mouth moved, but no sound came. After a moment he bowed his head.

He was the last person Rush spoke to. Not Irina, not anyone else. He. He ought to tell Rush's friends - also his friends now, he'd like to think - what those last words were, let them know Rush left with the usual goofy grin on his face. But to repeat those words was to admit that Rush had died. In his mind, Rush only left, rather than died. He could not talk about him in the past tense.

"Rush quite literally fell into my life a little over a year ago," David began after taking a deep breath, his gaze fixed on his own hands, his voice tight, "because of the Gae Bolg, ironically enough. Other than that, I'm afraid there is little I can say. I have not yet come to terms with what has happened. I do not wish to weep in front of you, and I believe he doesn't want me to, either."

Seated next to David, the leader of the Silver Falcons put a hand on David's shoulder and squeezed it. "That's okay."

"My apologies."

"He often talked about you. He admired you very much, saying what tremendous work you do for your people and how patient and supportive you were of him. Listening to him made even someone like me consider offering my services to Athlum."

"I dare not imagine the legal problems that would cause, but thank you for the sentiment, truly." Years of emotional training kicked in. David was able to chuckle politely instead of show how much those words got to him.

Through the night, David learned that Rush mentioned him to other people a lot. Dave said this. Dave did that. Dave was awesome.

David would not have used the same words, but if he was to talk about Rush, he would have said the same thing. But he never talked to anyone about Rush that way.

 

It had been a month since their return from Elysion. During that time, David ordered that no one was to touch the personal effects Rush had left in his suite. After spending the night with Rush's friends, however, David decided it was time to face the aftermath.

It should be a quick task. Even though he had stayed in Athlum for more than a year, Rush didn't have much personal possessions. Even so, David had not expected to find the suite completely cleared and tidied up, as if no one had ever lived there.

His first reaction was to summon one of the staff and demand to know who it was that dared to come in here against his orders, but he stopped himself. Did it really matter any more?

He found a bag on the sofa. It contained everything Rush brought with him from Eulam, neatly packed.

There was something else. Another bag, a small one, in the fireplace, charred but mostly intact. Instead of burning, it appeared to have smothered the fire of air. In the clean and tidy room, the blackened item stood out, as if calling for David to look at it.

David remembered raising an eyebrow when he saw Rush carrying this bag when they were about to depart for the Sacred Lands to fight the Conqueror. Rush said he had a few things he didn't want to leave behind, only to be told by David that they would come home straight afterwards and nobody at the castle would steal his things, so Rush shouldn't take any additional weight when he didn't have to. They had a small discussion - not quite an argument - about it until David asked just what it was that Rush meant to take. At that point Rush became silent and put the bag back in his suite. Later, David felt a bit guilty and asked him about it, but he shrugged and said that he most probably wouldn't be able to take it with him anyway. David never did understand what he meant.

He had no business nosing around Rush's belongings, but David rescued the bag, shook the ashes off it, and looked inside.

It was full of visistones.

Alarm bells began to ring in David's head.

He drew the curtains, took out one of the visistones at random and set it up on the floor. Light sparked and flickered for a while, then an image of Torgal formed in the space before him, looking slightly perplexed.

> "Just what are you doing?" Torgal asked.
> 
> From the background came Rush's voice. "Testing to see if it works. I've only ever used crappy ones that can film for two minutes. Smile, Torgal!"
> 
> Torgal's expression became a little strained. "The layout of the castle is not public information. You mustn't - "
> 
> "I know. I won't show this to anyone."
> 
> The angle of the image changed, then Rush appeared. He stood beside Torgal and waved at the visistone for a brief moment, a grin on his face, before going back to pick up the device from the floor.

The sight of Rush made David's chest clench, but also made him smile. The fact that Torgal was clearly uncomfortable with being recorded this way only added to the amusement.

> "What is the purpose of this?" Torgal crossed his upper set of arms.
> 
> "Just keeping a record of my friends. Then if I go away... say, if I go back to Eulam, then I have these to look at."
> 
> "Do you not intend to stay in Athlum? I thought - "
> 
> "Who knows? We'll see, yeah?"

David paused the playback.

So it was true. It was Rush who tidied the room. He had packed his own things, knowing he might not return, to help make life easier for whoever had to sort things out after him.

He went to the Sacred Lands to die.

Taking a shuddering breath, David let the playback resume.

> Rush found Blocter next. The yama's image grew larger and larger as he neared Rush, then disappeared as he, presumably, threw his arms around Rush.
> 
> "I'm so chuffed, Rush! Athlum's independent! Aw, man, I've been running around all day, I can't stop! I'm so happy. Can't believe that Qubine brat just came and said all that!"
> 
> "Yeah, it's totally awesome!" Rush laughed, Blocter slowly appeared again as a partially-transparent image.
> 
> "Hey, wha'cha doin' with that?" Blocter peered at the visistone.
> 
> "Well, it's a big day for Athlum, so I thought I'd make a record of it."
> 
> "Brilliant idea! You should talk to Young Master! Then we can all watch this years later and it'll be really cool!"
> 
> "Yeah, I'll do that. Where's Dave?"
> 
> "The inner garden I think?"
> 
> A while later, David's own image appeared. He was standing in his mother's garden. Unlike what he did with Torgal and Blocter, however, Rush didn't approach him. David had not noticed he was being filmed. Was Rush hidden somewhere, perhaps behind a pillar?
> 
> For several long minutes, neither David nor Rush moved, the former lost in his own thoughts and the latter probably too polite to intrude. Rush just watched him.
> 
> The image jolted when suddenly there was the sound of footsteps.
> 
> "Mr David." It was Irina.
> 
> "You're up. How do you feel?"
> 
> "I'm great! I'm totally fine! I hope I didn't worry everyone too much..."
> 
> "We're just glad you're all right."

David remembered this conversation. This was soon after they got Irina back from Darken Forest, the day Celapaleis relinquished its control on Athlum, around two months ago. When he cast his memory back to that day, every detail crashed into his mind in vibrant colours and emotions.

> Rush must have turned away at that point, because all of a sudden all David could see were Rush's feet, although voices could still be heard.
> 
> "Mr David, congratulations on Athlum's independence."
> 
> "Thank you. You know, it is partly because of you that this is even possible. For that, I'm truly grateful."
> 
> "Me? I didn't do anything! I..."

Listening to this memory being played before him now, David realised he never thanked Rush for what he had done. But surely Rush understood.

> There was a moment of quiet. He was waiting to hear what Irina had really come to say, maybe an explanation on why she went to meet the Conqueror on her own, an act very out of character for a girl who had always been so responsible.
> 
> "Sis, don't..."

In retrospect, it was all so obvious. Marion's Blessing had told Irina about her brother's true nature, something Rush already realised some time ago. This was why Irina chose to speak to the Conqueror.

> Irina wasn't ready to talk about it. David didn't push her, allowing her to escape with the excuse that she needed to pack for the trip to Undelwalt.
> 
> Rush breathed a long sigh of relief, then came out of his hiding. "Hey, Dave!"
> 
> An incomplete image of David came into view, showing only his torso. "Rush. We depart for Undelwalt soon. Have you made preparations?"
> 
> "Er, well..." There was nothing to see again. Rush must have put the visistone away. "Not really."
> 
> "Then please get to it. I don't want any delay."
> 
> "Fine." Footsteps, slow at first, then becoming a run, sound of shoes on stone floor echoing loudly in hallways, followed by a thump.
> 
> "Be careful!" Emmy's voice.
> 
> "Sorry!"
> 
> "Are you in a hurry?"
> 
> There was a hint of a smile in Rush's reply. "Yeah. Toilet."
> 
> Emmy laughed. Rapid footsteps resumed, followed by the slamming of a door, and then a body crashing against it.
> 
> "Dammit!"

The recording ended there.

Staring into the empty space in front of him, the high-pitched sound of silence in his ears, David wished Rush had told him what he was doing back then. If he had known, he would not have sent Rush away so rudely. There could have been images of them smiling together, David would have talked about Rush's pivotal role in Athlum's independence, Rush would have got the recognition he deserved. They could have had memories of stolen moments of peace and happiness, rather than of war, one which brought Rush to him and then snatched him away.

He wished Rush had told him the truth about everything then.

Instead, David was left with nothing but regret and questions.

 

Caedmon sent David a message using the secret arrangement David told him about. With very artistic handwriting that reminded David of old literature that were copied by hand rather than printed, Caedmon wrote that Nora had something she must discuss with David.

David's impression of Nora was vague. With Rush as the intermediary, the Ladies of Bloody Alice and Athlumian forces had joined hands once to eradicate remaining members of the Third Committee at Plain of Luhang, but it wasn't an operation directly led by David and even on the field, he and Nora did not speak to each other. He only knew her to be an intense woman, fuelled by an unusual hatred and anger. When David asked Rush about her, all Rush said was that Nora was a good person. She and Rush were rather close and at one point Blocter had even joked that perhaps Rush liked older women. Suspicions were indeed raised when Rush had supposedly gone out to meet her and didn't return for the night, but when asked, Rush always just shrugged and let people say whatever they wanted to say, causing more than a few arched eyebrows.

It was something David never commented on. He might imagine himself to be the closest person to Rush, but of course his company could not be compared with that of a woman.

To be truthful, he had been waiting for this day. He had to face her at some point, and explain the circumstances under which the man she loved left.

Since Athlum and Bloody Alice had worked together before, it would not be too strange to put out an invitation. Under the pretence of a discussion on how to locate and remove any Third Committee member still in hiding, he requested Nora to come to Athlum Castle.

Nora came the next day. David waited for security to let her through. When she appeared at the meeting room, she was holding her knee-high purple boots in one hand and threatening to punch a member of staff with the other. The staff shirked back and once again tried to tell her to put the boots back on before meeting with the Lord of Athlum. Chuckling, David dismissed the frightened man with the wave of a hand. Before Nora closed the door, he saw that Torgal was standing outside. He sent him away.

Nora helped herself to a seat and began the laborious task of putting her boots back on. "Goddammit. First they tried to strip-search me, then they made me take these off. Do you know how long it takes me to do the laces? They didn't even get me a chair!"

"I'm sorry about that. I will get them to review the arrangements."

Nora sneered, tugging hard on her boot laces. "Whatever. It's not like I want to be coming here often."

Something about Nora seemed different from before. Not that David had seen her that many times, but to his memory Nora used to wear a lot of cosmetics, whereas the woman who was battling with her boots right now was completely fresh-faced.

David blinked several times in surprise when he realised that Nora was, in fact, quite young, perhaps only a couple of years his senior.

When she was finally done, David took a seat near her. "I guess you want to talk about Rush."

Twisting herself a little, Nora let an elbow hang over the back of her chair. "Yeah, so where's he? I need to bloody kill that kid."

Shocked, David just stared at her. Didn't she know? "Miss Nora, Rush... he's gone."

"Do I look like an idiot?" She glared at him. "I know he's gone. I felt it when it happened, it kept me in bed for a month. Sheer hell, that was. If you haven't got him back yet, we need to do it now so that I can kill him!"

At that, he didn't know what to say, except the truth. "I'm afraid I don't understand what you are talking about."

The response made Nora pause. She regarded him. "Didn't he tell you about me?"

"Was there something I was supposed to know?"

She snorted, shaking her head slowly. "I did warn him not to tell anyone, but I thought he might have told you."

"I know very little about you, I must say. Rush doesn't seem to like to discuss personal relationships."

Her eyes widened as she studied the look on David's face. "What, you think that punk and I are together?"

"Are you not?"

"What made you think that?"

David looked to the side. "Well, sometimes he said he was going out to meet you, and did not come back for the night. We teased him about it a little, but he never explained himself."

Nora smirked. "Oh, this just gets better. Apparently we're fucking as well?" She flicked her wrist. "Not a bad thought; he's quite cute."

David tried not to gape at her but failed miserably. He had met all sorts of people in his life, but never a woman who talked like this. Anyone, however unreserved they claimed to be, became mindful of what they said when they were in front of him. Rush was the one exception.

"You don't look convinced."

"No, I'm simply surprised by how frank you are."

"Frank, huh." Nora uncrossed her legs and stood. "Life's short, no time to waste going around in circles. I'll get straight to the point. Look at this."

To David's shock, the woman began to pull up her top, tugging down her skin-tight trousers at the same time. He turned away immediately. "Miss Nora! Please remember yourself!"

He heard a snort. "You're cute. Come on, take a look. Don't be shy."

David dared to steal a glance, then what he saw made him gasp and look more closely. There was a scar across Nora's lower abdomen, easily ten inches or longer, the dark brown tissue wrinkled and twisted against the pale smoothness of the rest of her skin. It suggested a wound too severe to be healed by mystic art, sewn back together hastily and without consideration for how it would look in the future.

"Is that... from battle?"

"Surgery." Nora covered herself up again and sat down. "The Third Committee took out my woman parts: the organs, the sensory bits, the whole shebang. Makes me a more efficient fighter, I don't get bogged down by monthly cycles and there's no chance of me running off with men. Funny of you to think I've been sleeping with Rush; I don't feel anything down there and can't have kids. Though that might be just as well, God knows what kind of monster would pop out if I reproduced."

His mouth agape, David had no words to say. The fact that Third Committee was capable of doing something so inhuman came as no shock, but to see it with his own eyes and hear it described to him with such crudeness was not something he would ever have expected.

"Dave - I'm going to call you that - I was an experimental subject. They fused me with a Remnant. They literally put it in the space where they pulled my organs out, then fused it to me with magick. Until a month ago I had to eat several times what a normal mitra eats just to stay alive. That's what Rush and I had in common - we were both Remnants. Or half Remnants, freaks, whatever you want to call us."

David didn't really dare to speak. He imagined Kellendros being fused to his eye. "Please continue."

Nora helped herself to the cakes the servants had laid out on the table beforehand. "When Rush pulled that stunt, my Remnant died. It's the single most fucking painful thing in my life; I hadn't been able to get out of bed until a few days ago. I need to kill him for that."

David's mind began to rewind to what she said earlier: we need to get him back. She couldn't possibly mean there was a way for Rush to return. But if she survived the Remnants' destruction, then...

"What he told me was," Nora leaned back into her seat, cake in hand. The old furniture creaked gently, "he wasn't sure if he was born a Remnant or became one by accident when he was young, he just remembers being in the Sacred Lands as a kid and seeing his mother there, crying because he wasn't supposed to be in that particular place. He might have been born a mitra and then got fused with a Remnant because he touched something he shouldn't have. Best way to clear that up would be to ask his mother."

David stood up and began to pace. Could he afford to hope? "You are suggesting that, if Rush was not born a Remnant, then it is possible that he still lives." He looked at her and she nodded. "If that is true, then where is he now?"

"How should I know?"

"Miss Nora," David stopped, hands behind his back. He turned towards Nora but didn't really look at her, "what would you have me do then, if that is your answer? You've come here to tell me these things about Remnants which are beyond my comprehension, but where it truly matters, you have nothing. What am I supposed to do?"

"That's for you to figure out, isn't it? I was an experimental subject, not a researcher. I can tell you in every gory detail what they've done to me if that gives you the kicks, but I can't explain anything, okay?"

The outburst made David check himself. For a young woman to show something so intimate and personal to someone who was essentially a complete stranger, only to witness his fears, disguised as anger and frustration - how could he do this to her? But how could he tell her that he did not dare to get his hopes up only to have them shattered?

"I apologise," he started, but did not know how to continue.

Nora pushed her chair back, making its legs scrape on floor boards, and stood. "Do you want him back or not?"

"Of course I do." He couldn't even begin to tell her how much he wanted Rush back. "However..."

She clearly disagreed with that last word. "Rush would never hesitate if you were the one who disappeared."

David had nothing to say. Nora was right. He was still the same idiot who just sat there and watched the Conqueror blaze a trail of destruction until Rush put sense into his head. What was he doing standing here, debating whether or not it was possible to save Rush? How could he know without trying? Even if it all turned out to be in vain, what was the pain of anguish compared with the sacrifice Rush made so that he could live?

"He thinks so much of you, but you turn out to be nothing but a wuss." Nora went to the door. When her eyes settled on his again, the anger that burned in them had the same intensity as that when she fought the Third Committee. " _You_ are the one with the contacts and the resources. _You_ are the one who watched him go. _You_ failed him. You bloody well bring him back or I'll make sure you never sleep at night again!"

She yanked the door open, but did not leave right away, waiting for his response.

"I will, Miss Nora," David said, ashamed, and with renewed conviction. "Thank you."

They studied one another for a while, then Nora smiled and let herself out.


	2. Chapter 2

_The woman's hold on David was firm and, although not comfortable, reassuringly familiar._

_They were part of the stream of people who were stepping through a pair of double doors, and the moment they did it was as if they had arrived in a different dimension. Suddenly, inexplicably, David was afraid._

_Everyone kept walking forward, except for a boy of perhaps five or six years, who was standing to one side and watching the flow. Beside the boy, as if watching over him, a tall woman and a few others._

_The one holding David went over to the group. She went down on one knee, took the boy's hand, and David was passed from one to the other. David was not as he knew himself. Right now he was light and small, so that even a boy could carry him._

_"This belongs to him. Give this back when he comes to fetch you, okay?"_

_"But..."_

_"We can't wait with you," she said, glancing up at the taller woman and the people around them, "but we will protect you."_

 

The boat ride from Athlum to Eulam took two hours. The preparations, however, was worth half a week's effort by a team of very dedicated people. It was not easy for a Lord to travel unnoticed, and with the security situation not having stablised yet after the Remnant War, even going to somewhere considered as remote and backwater by most people meant a huge amount of background arrangements. David made no apology for this, though. This was a trip he had to make.

"My lord?"

"Yes?"

"Is there anything I can help you with?"

David shifted his gaze from the sea to Emmy.

"You seem... something seems to be happening. Nora came to see you, and there was that time you left the castle at night..."

David smiled. So Torgal and Emmy had been talking about him. "Yes, something may happen."

Emmy looked at him, expectant.

"I cannot be sure at the moment, but as soon as I can, you will be the first to know."

When the boat began to make berth, David stood, and one by one the rest of the "passengers" did the same. He was the third person to disembark, Emmy following closely behind. The rest of the security staff, dressed as regular travellers, dispersed and went to their designated locations. David looked at Emmy, who nodded at him, smiling, and led the way.

Eulam was a very small island, to the extent that one could walk from one end of it to the other in an hour and the children took the boat everyday to go to school at a nearby larger island. During his year's stay in Athlum, Rush had described to David every detail of the place he came from and said that David must come to visit one day. David, as the Marquis and now the Duke of Athlum, had never been able to enjoy the luxury of dropping by or staying over at a friend's house. But for him to pay a visit now, under such circumstances, was something he never wanted.

Even before Emmy gestured at the Sykes's residence, David knew they had arrived. He hadn't realised he could recall so much of what Rush told him, from the waist-high gate decorated with a wooden plaque Rush had carved for a school project to the weirdly shaped tree in the garden. He stopped for a moment, the hand carrying Rush's bag squeezing tighter, before opening the gate and walking up to the door.

The Sykes were expecting them. They let David and Emmy inside before exchanging greetings.

"Lord David, General Emmy, for you to come all this way," said Marina Sykes, her gaze settling on Rush's bag for a moment. "Please, make yourselves at home. I will make some tea."

Irina showed them to the front room. "How are you, Mr David, Emmy?"

"We are doing fine. Our work keeps us busy, but we're happy that way." David smiled. "How about you?"

"I'm good! Getting back to school is a bit difficult, but other than that everything's been brilliant."

Emmy leaned forward. "Are you having problems with homework? You've missed a great deal of school when you were in Athlum."

"It's not that." Irina shook her head. "It's just... people ask questions about me, and the war, and all of those things." When David started to frown, she waved her hands and grinned in a way that reminded David of Rush. "But it's okay! People will forget all that after a while!"

David sighed. For all the people whose lives had been changed because of the Conqueror, the war was far from over. It was this way for Emmy, for Irina, and also for him.

"You are a very strong girl, Irina. I'm sure your family is very proud of you. I'm sure Rush is proud of you."

Irina nodded, her smile turning a little sad. "Speaking of my brother... did he ever say anything strange to you about me, Mr David?"

"Hmm? Nothing that I can think of."

Irina exchanged a look at Emmy. Emmy cocked her head to one side, a smile finding its way to her lips as if recalling a fond memory.

"If he ever said anything - it's not true. Don't believe it. My stupid brother liked to push everything on me and blame me for everything, good or bad." The girl looked down and clutched her hands together, "If he did say anything to you about me, please just forget it, because it's completely not true."

"Okay, Irina. Don't worry." David said gently, wondering what lie it was that Irina thought Rush might have told.

Marina Sykes returned with a tray of drinks. Rush's father was out at work. They sat down and did some catching up until the conversation as well as tea ran out. After Marina made some fresh tea, David picked up the bag that had been by his feet, putting it on his lap.

"I have Rush's personal items here. I meant to return them." Everyone's gentle smiles faded, but David carried on. "But before that, Dr Sykes, may I ask a few questions about Rush? I apologise for being so invasive at such a sensitive time, but there are answers which I need."

Marina nodded slowly. "You have been nothing but kind to my family. I'd be happy to help you if I can."

"Would it be okay if we talk here," David glanced at Irina. He felt she had the right to know, but he wasn't about to meddle with Rush's family's dynamics, "or would you prefer to talk in private?"

"There is nothing I need to hide from my daughter any longer."

"Then," David let his arms rest on Rush's bag, "pardon me for being direct, but is Rush your son by blood or was he adopted?"

The question took everyone by surprise. "He was mine."

"Then, the fact that he is a Remnant..."

"That came later," said Marina, and right away David could hardly contain his excitement. "As you know, John and I had to go to the Sacred Lands for research on an irregular basis. The Remnant Ark could only be used once every few months, so once we went we couldn't come back for quite some time. When Rush was still small, we couldn't possibly leave him behind or rely on someone else to look after him for that amount of time, so we took him with us. It was our fault."

"So he became a Remnant in the Sacred Lands."

"He went inside a room he should not have been able to get into. The Remnant Elysion itself has locked that door and theoretically only someone who has bound that Remnant should be able to get inside. Perhaps it could be done with Marion's Blessing, but I wasn't aware it was in my blood until after I had Irina, and Rush never showed any sign of it. I wasn't there to see it happen, but from what Rush described to me afterwards, it seemed like there was another Remnant inside Remnant Elysion, and that Remnant became a part of him."

Listening to Marina's story, David had several theories, but he must clarify one point first. "So he was not born a Remnant."

"Absolutely not, Lord David."

It might be possible that Rush could still be saved!

All the women gaped when they saw a genuine smile spreading on David's lips. He shook his head, trying to regain his composure, but he could not stop that feeling of glee.

"I may not be a researcher, but my experience of being bound to the Gae Bolg suggests a few possible scenarios. Assuming that the Remnant inside the Sacred Lands was one so powerful it had the role of the warden, it is possible that it had deliberately let Rush inside and made him its host. Or perhaps Rush accidentally used Marion's Blessing to gain access, and then touched what he should not have. Maybe he bound it by chance, but because he was only a child, the Remnant became a major part of him." David gripped the strap of the bag on his lap. "Whatever the case, Dr Sykes, Irina," he smiled at them, "there has been a change of plan. I shall be holding on to this bag. I have hopes of personally handing it back to its owner."

 

"Did something happen?" was the first thing Torgal said when David and Emmy returned.

His head tilted to one side, David waited for Torgal to explain his question.

"You seem... less burdened than you have been in the past few weeks, and you are still holding the bag you meant to return."

Trust Torgal to see through him straight away. David had Emmy gather the generals together and explain what she knew. At the Sykes's, he didn't give the name of the person who lost the Remnant they were fused with, but seeing how close this was to his meeting with Nora, the generals would be able to put two and two together. He would have to apologise to Nora later on, even though he did not disclose more details than necessary and she never asked him not to tell anyone.

The Sykes had agreed to delve into their wealth of knowledge and use what connections they had with other ex-Academy staff to find out what they could. The illegal side of Remnant research, however, was something for David to discover.

As he neared Rush's suite, David drew up a list of names in his head. He must talk to Nora again. Jager, the Third Committee captain who fought for Wagram but defected long before the end of the war, might know something. He would also have to approach the Duke of Ghor, who personally saw to the dissolution of the Academy. That was going to be a very tricky conversation. And how about the previous head of the Academy?

Entering the suite, David put the bag back where he found it. Perhaps he should search Rush's things, they could hold clues as to where Rush might be. And there was the other bag, which he had taken to his own chambers rather than to Eulam with him as he should have. He couldn't say why he did that, but what was done, was done.

He should look at those visistones.

The rest of David's day was dogged by paperwork and meetings with various ministers; there seemed to be a lot of these crammed together in the last few days. He wondered how he was going to find the time to search for Rush, but he would just have to manage somehow. Just as Nora said, he had to be the one to do this. He. No one else.

After a dinner that was more like a midnight meal, David retired to his chambers and changed out of his day clothes, stretching muscles that were stiff from sitting down for too long. He finally understood why his late father liked to pace around during meetings. Rush would definitely laugh at him if he saw him now.

After a bath to temporarily wash away the stress of the day, David sat on his bed, Rush's bag in front of him. He took out every visistone in the bag. Examining closely, he realised that each visistone was dated along its side. The recording he already watched was one of the earlier ones.

He lined them up on the end of his bed, standing each on its shorter edge like a series of dominoes.

These were Rush's memories. David had no right to look into them. He could claim that he was looking for clues on Rush's whereabouts, but how could Rush's day-to-day life possibly give any information about the Remnants' mysteries, really?

But if doing this would make Rush angry with him, then all the more reason for Rush to try his best to return so that he could shout at him.

> Emmy and Irina were sitting together, probably during a moment of calm they had all learned how to steal since the war began to wear on them. Emmy had a large needle in one hand and some yarn in the other, and Irina was copying her.
> 
> "Hey, what're you guys doing?"
> 
> "Irina said she wanted to learn how to crochet." Emmy looked up, then arched an eyebrow. "And what are you doing?"
> 
> "Recording your epic... crochet?... adventures."
> 
> "Go away, Rush! I can't concentrate with you hovering over my shoulder!"
> 
> "Yeah, blame me rather than your lack of technique."
> 
> The angle switched. Standing in front of the girls, Rush turned the visistone around and extended his arm at an angle above his head so that he appeared in the projected image as well, although he only managed to capture the top half of his face.
> 
> "So are you actually making something?"
> 
> "Not yet, I only just started learning! Just leave us alone, go bother someone else."
> 
> "Fine," said Rush, who disappeared from view again, "Emmy, teach her more stuff. She doesn't even know how to put up her hair nice or wear make-up. The only girly thing about her is the skirt, if she keeps it up she's never gonna get a boyfriend."
> 
> Irina, who had her hands full, could not find a way to attack her brother, so she tried kicking him instead.
> 
> "Come on! I'm just trying to help," Rush teased, jumping back. "Thinking about your future and all. You need to be more ladylike to catch Dave's attention, kiddo."
> 
> Irina glared for a moment, then let her eyes settle back on the work at hand. "For the last time, I don't like Mr David!"
> 
> "What?" Emmy's hands stopped working. She pressed her voice low. "Irina! You like Lord David?"
> 
> "I don't! Don't listen to that idiot brother of mine!"
> 
> "The proof's in the denial."
> 
> "If you really like him, maybe I can help things along a bit..."
> 
> The poor girl appeared to be giving up. Slamming down her needle and thread, she folded her arms on the table and buried her face in them. "Shut. Up. It's not true."
> 
> A hand waved Emmy over. She came near Rush, who whispered, "she's shy about it, but she likes him. Seriously. So give her some help, please?" before backing away.
> 
> "Well, I'll leave you girls to it. Knit a sexy bra or something, yeah?"
> 
> Amidst Irina's painful wail and his own laughter, Rush ran off before anyone could stab him with crochet needles.

Jager, ex-captain of the Third Committee and an unlikely comrade of Rush's, used to be a vagrant, a fighter of no fixed address and no allegiance who offered his services to the highest bidder. He had signed a contract to work for Wilfred Hermeien, thinking that working for the Duke of Nagapur meant having a stable life at long last. But later, disgusted and disillusioned by the kidnap of Irina Sykes as well as Wagram and Hermeien's warmongering ways, he ended his association with the Third Committee before Hermeien's death was even confirmed. It was Rush who persuaded him to hand himself in, around the time the Duke of Ghor took office as the chairman of the Congress. Along with a limited number of other Third Committee members, Jager's background was thoroughly scrutinised, and it was judged that his role in the war was minimal and involuntary. He served a brief sentence and when the war ended, he was officially pardoned.

It was a decision Torgal vehemently disagreed with as soon as he caught wind of it. David said he believed in second chances. Torgal, not mincing his words, said that David was only doing this because of Rush.

"So what if I am?" David had asked at that point, irate, "would you and I even be here to discuss this had it not been for Rush?"

"For that very reason, would you not be more cautious, to safeguard the peace he gifted us with?"

"Enough." David ended the conversation with a swing of his arm, then gestured at the document he had signed. "My mind is made. Put the arrangements in place."

"Lord David!"

There were many things David could have said, but he gave Torgal no reply.

The document explained the strings attached to the amnesty - Jager was to report to the authorities about any ex-Third Committee members he came into contact with and aid David in any decision he would have to make in regards to the future of these people. Athlum might, at any point, assign him with work related or not related to the aftermath of the war. In effect, Jager was to become Athlum's agent. David could have explained this to Torgal during their conversation, but if Torgal must jump to the conclusion that his lord was full of childish illusions and knew not how to protect himself or his land and people, then David didn't want to discuss it with him at all. Torgal would not trust him no matter what he said, but he would believe what was written in ink.

Though, when Torgal returned later in the day and apologised, David did feel a pang of guilt. Torgal might think he was childish, yet David's handling of this was not very mature either.

With Jager being somewhat a sore point between them because of this, David asked Blocter rather than Torgal to go with him to meet with the mercenary turned Third-Committee-captain turned tattoo-artist-and-agent.

Jager was already there when they arrived at Warrior's Honor's upstairs space, an area not known to the pub's regular patrons. The bartender, a colourful character who was also on Athlum Castle's payroll, brought some drinks up to them and left them alone.

"Whoa, didn't expect to see the big guy himself," said Jager as David sat down. "Am I in trouble?"

David smiled. "Have you done anything that might land you in trouble?"

"Ha, I might not be very smart, but I'm not stupid enough to bite the hand that feeds me," Jager took a swig of his beer, his other hand scratching his partially shaved and tattooed head, "or the hand that freed me."

It was hard not to like Jager. He had made a wrong choice of employer before, but that was his only crime. On a personal level, he was open and jovial. Under the rough exterior was a man who counted his blessings and always tried to return a favour tenfold. David wished Torgal could spend some time to talk to Jager, then he would know what lunacy it would be to keep this man behind bars.

"I need your help with a few things."

"You don't gotta say. I'll do whatever you want."

"This isn't work; I'd just like to pry your brain a little."

"Uh, not so sure 'bout that. I mean, go ahead, I just can't guarantee results. But once you get heavier with the brawn you gotta give up a bit of the brains, yanno?"

Blocter and Jager laughed, their beer mugs clinking together.

"I need you to tell me as much as you can about Remnants," David began after the two quieted down. "Everything you know."

Jager's eyebrows rose. "I've told ya everything before already."

"Then tell me again. Give me any detail you might have missed before. Do you know anything about the illegal research of Remnants?"

"That's the other arm of the Third Committee. I've never talked to those guys. Heard they were all complete bonkers."

"How about Wagram? Did he not ever say anything to you about Remnants?"

It looked like Jager was thinking hard. "No, man."

David expected this. He should ask questions he had not already asked before. "Have you ever talked to the Conqueror?"

"Huh, no. Don't ever met him."

"Roeas? Castanea?"

"Who?"

Blocter spoke up. "The Conqueror's sidekicks. Roeas was this mitra lady with long blonde hair and purple armour and always talked like she was making some announcement, and Castanea was a really big guy..."

"With massive horns on his helmet. Right, those two. Met 'em once. Some legs that woman's got."

David leaned forward. "What did you talk about?"

"We didn't really talk, they had a message from the Conqueror for Wagram, I was just standin' around. It was something about... you know, I honestly don't remember. It's a year ago. Is it true that they were all Remnants, anyway?"

"Perhaps. There is no way to tell any more."

"Hmm, you gotta wonder where they all came from. I mean, did those people become Remnants? Or did some Remnants just like to pretend to be people?"

The questions made David pause, Rush's face flashing across his mind. The way Rush "became" a Remnant was different from how it happened to Nora, so no one could say if David's efforts were futile or not. But for how long had Rush known the truth and just pretended? Nora said Rush didn't even know for certain where he came from. How did that feel?

He half-turned when he heard a faint knock. "Yup!" said Blocter, and the bartender opened the door at the far end, beers in his hands.

"Lord David, General Blocter and the lovely gentleman," the bartender said by ways of greeting, putting down new mugs for Blocter and Jager, but nothing for David who was still working his way through the first pint, "anything else you'd like? May I suggest some beer-battered oarfish from Crookfen? With chips?"

David could guess Blocter's response even before the bartender finished his sentence. "Mmm! That sounds good!"

"I'll bring some up in a moment then. Is there anything else I can help with?"

The man glanced at David, losing the look of the smarmy businessman for a moment. David tilted his head to one side. They weren't really getting anywhere, it couldn't hurt to put a fresh mind on this. "We've been talking about the Conqueror."

"Oh, him." The bartender drew back a little. "I must say I don't like beards, but he was very impressionable. I have such a weakness for blonds."

David arched an eyebrow.

"Well, it's just a rumour, but I heard that General Pagus's friend in Celapaleis knows a thing or two about the man." The man took the empty beer mugs. "Personally though, I'm more intrigued about where he and his friends lived. It's clearly a place where all the good-looking people congregate."

At that, Jager sat up, his reaction comical. "Ahhh!"

The bartender had a wry smile. "Have I asked the right question?"

"It seems that way," said David, watching Jager wave his arms about as if trying to capture a memory lost in the air. Excitement began to brew. How had he managed to miss such a simple question before? "You have my gratitude, Sir George."

"Oh, please just call me Georgina." The bartender winked and bowed. Sitting opposite David, Jager seemed traumatised, but David just laughed. "Always at your service, my lord."

 

"Pagus!"

David's shout rang exceptionally loudly as he stormed into the audience chamber. Finding it dark and empty, he whipped around and glared at the guard at the entrance. "Where in the world is everyone?"

The guard cringed. "Lord David, it is almost three hours past midnight."

The reply made David pause. Blocter had gone home after coming with him to the castle gate. It was nearly pitch black outside, the view from the audience chamber, now without Valeria Heart's serene glow, was only of the stars. His rush of adrenaline meant he overlooked all the obvious, thinking only about what he had learned.

Without another word, he headed for the library. Wagram once mentioned to Jager that he was going to leave for a while to make contact with "the finest fighters in the known world and beyond" at "the eastern town of Veyriel". That was the name of the place where the Seven, the Conqueror's faithful Remnant fighters, were based. Maybe it was where they came into existence. David had to find out where Veyriel was.

> "Mum? Dad? Are you busy?"
> 
> "Hey there, son," said John, shifting his focus from the object he had been staring at to Rush. "What have you got there? A visistone?"
> 
> Rush walked over. He put the visistone down on a surface somewhere so that he could stand with his parents and be in the picture himself as well. "Yeah, our fine family tradition."
> 
> Marina chuckled. "Your dad took so many of them every time we went away to work, they took up half the luggage space."
> 
> The Sykes were standing around the tracking Remnant the Academy lent to Athlum. Rush took a look. "If you're busy, maybe I'll come back later."
> 
> "We want to fine tune this Remnant as soon as we can. Your Marquis friend needs it." Marina glanced at Rush, then her eyes settled back to the object in front of her.
> 
> "Sorry I can't help. Remnants are all gobbledygook to me," Rush muttered, stealing a look at his mother. "I don't understand them at all."
> 
> "That's fine, Rush. If possible I want you and Irina to stay as far away from them as possible."
> 
> "Remnants are that bad, huh."
> 
> Marina froze momentarily. "They can be dangerous, that's all. It all depends on the person who is bound to them."
> 
> "There are good Remnants too." John pointed at Rush's talisman. "This one's been protecting you."
> 
> Rush nodded. "Yeah." He took a step back. "Hey, after all this is done..."
> 
> "Yes?"
> 
> "I dunno, how about working less and being home more?"
> 
> The suggestion made John and Marina pull back from their work. Rush fidgeted, then shoved his hands into trouser pockets.
> 
> "I mean, Elysion's pretty far away and Irina's getting to that age where it's better to have a woman in the house, really." He shrugged. "It's kinda awkward for me. I'm not complaining, but..."
> 
> "I know. You've never complained." Marina's smile was sad. "We've left you to look after Irina for so long, and we're sorry. There was work that had to be done, because of the tablet."
> 
> "You were protecting us." Rush kept nodding. "But after this... after the Conqueror... you won't need to work so hard, right? You can be at home and look after Irina, right?"
> 
> The two Dr Sykes looked at each other, exchanging a smile. "Rush, we've been talking about leaving our jobs when the war is over."
> 
> "Really?" Rush seemed overjoyed. "You aren't lying, right? I'm recording this, you can't go back on your word!"
> 
> "Really. We'll quit the Academy, then we can go to live in Eulam, or Athlum, or wherever you and Irina like."
> 
> "Awesome! Thanks!"
> 
> "But for now, we need to get this tracking Remnant working. It might help end the war."
> 
> "Hmm." Rush leaned forward to peer at the glowing object. "So... have you cracked the great mystery? Where Remnants came from?"
> 
> There was a slight look of alarm in Marina's eyes, but Rush, turned towards his father, didn't see it. His own eyes were unreadable.
> 
> John was enthusiastic with his explanation. "Not yet. But I've come up with a different approach!"
> 
> "Yeah?"
> 
> "Remnants existed since at least a thousand years ago. We don't know if there's a limited number of them or if new ones come into existence, and we've exhausted ourselves researching in that direction. But if we can find out where they go to die..."
> 
> "John, I don't think we should be discussing this."
> 
> "Come on, he's our son," John replied to his wife, then turned back to Rush. "Elephant's graveyard, Rush. Nobody knows where the Remnants' final resting place is, assuming that Remnants can die."
> 
> "Uh huh..."
> 
> "It's nature's way. When it's time to go, we try to return to the place where we were born. It might be the same for Remnants too."


	3. Chapter 3

_The boy cradled him. Some people stood around them, towering above, faces he thought he ought to recognise but could not put names to._

_They were in a small space, about the length of Athlum Castle's audience chamber, with a pair of doors on either end. People were coming in from one pair of doors in a steady stream, crossing the space and entering the other pair of doors. Most, chatting and laughing as they walked by, paid the group no attention at all. Others slowed down to take a look, and occasionally their group received a smile or a small wave. But a few others, whose faceless presence made the child hold David tighter, actually stopped._

_Their protectors, led by two women, made sure no one could get close to them. Sometimes a glare was sufficient, but the persistent ones needed rougher methods._

_"Back off!"_

_"If I have it, I'll be able to go back there!"_

_"You don't belong there! We never belonged there to begin with!"_

_"And that little bastard, I'll - "_

_"You will not touch him!"_

 

David's eyes squeezed tightly shut for a few seconds, then opened slowly. He found himself sprawled over one of the huge desks at the library, surrounded by small towers of geography books and hand-painted lithographs, his face pressed against the pages of the oldest atlas in the land. The bracket clock over the fireplace said it was nearly midday. A gentle breeze blew in from a window he didn't remember opening. When he pushed himself up, a light blanket slipped from his shoulders. Someone else must have been in here.

He sat back in his chair, trying to shake off the effects of his dream. Eyes settling on the atlas in front of him, David let out a long breath. Rush. According to atlases both new and old, there was no such place as Veyriel. Had Jager lied, or had Jager been lied to? Perhaps he misremembered the name? Then again, would trying to find the place where Remnant might have come from be as simple a task as looking into geography books?

Pushing himself to a stand, he tried to recall if he had anything scheduled for the day, but his mind drew a blank. He must go and check. Hopefully he would have a free day, then he could put more time on this, and also get Pagus to work on it since he was the expert on such things. And then, to contact Lord Qubine about his General Maddox and Duke Ghor about the Academy.

But before he could leave the room, someone knocked on the door. "Enter," David said after checking that he didn't look too much like he had just woken up after falling asleep on a desk reading archaic texts and maps.

A servant came in, pushing a trolley of tea and food. David moved the books and prints aside. "Who sent you?"

"It was General Torgal, my lord. He also said to let you know that your day is free."

"Give him my thanks."

"Yes, my lord."

With a smile and a small shake of his head, David began to eat. As long as he wasn't being treated like a child, he didn't mind letting Torgal look after him.

 

After the meal and a long shower, David was told that General Maddox of Celapaleis was in the middle of some important work which he could not leave, but with Qubine's permission, he had just sent over some documents which may be of interest.

At the audience chamber, David looked at his own generals in surprise, until Pagus explained that Blocter discussed with them this morning what Jager had revealed and they decided to assume the Lord's permission to act on the information. "It was Torgal's idea," he added at the end, either to credit Torgal or in an attempt to absolve himself of any responsibility depending on David's reaction.

Torgal, as usual, said nothing.

The documents came in a large box bearing General Maddox's seal. David opened it and peered inside.

"What?"

Pagus came over, saw the chrysalis-like structure inside the box, and laughed. "Good old Maddox. He's been at it again."

With a nod from David, Pagus lifted the item. He took out a pocket knife and started to free the document from its string cocoon its sender had obsessively wrapped it in. The process took a while, David had to clench his fists to stop himself from fidgeting, his eyes fixed on the object as if the moment the final piece of string was cut, the Conqueror's secrets would be revealed or, even, Rush would jump right out from it.

How was Rush now? He must be stuck somewhere, otherwise he would have come back by now. Maybe he was being held by a power he could not control. Maybe he was waiting for someone to free him. But it had been more than a month since the day all Remnants died. Even if he survived, if Rush was a normal mitra now, he could be dead. Starvation, thirst, disease, fiends - anything could have happened by now.

But if they had switched places, David knew Rush would never let anything stop him. Rush never gave up. David would follow his example.

David smiled. Even now, Rush was still the one in control and doing the leading.

"Aha!" Pagus said when he pulled out what was wrapped under the mess of strings - a large envelope. He reached inside and pulled out a thick pile of paper.

Maddox was once "sacked" by Lord Qubine from his position as a Celapaleisian General so that he could be free to travel and investigate the mysteries surrounding the Conqueror. Qubine was a cautious man - research had started long before anyone considered the Conqueror a threat. When the Conqueror held the Remnant Ark hostage at Elysion, Qubine put Maddox on the case full time. The documents Pagus was handing to David were the fruits of Maddox's hard work.

David let each of his general take some of the pages and they read in silence. Torgal, a fast reader, was the first to look up and shake his head. One by one the rest of them did the same, until Emmy was the only one still reading. At one point, she began to frown, and read from a page out loud.

"One soldier survived when the Conqueror's Seven took over the bases at Koenigsdorf. She was unable to provide any information on the people who attacked her, but claimed to have heard the man named Young say, 'I can't believed he dragged all seven of us all the way from Veyriel...'" Emmy paused, glancing up at her lord before continuing, "'...for something like this!' All method have been used and exhausted on the research on Veyriel. It cannot even be confirmed if it is a location or a code word."

"Veyriel. I have searched all night on this place and came up with nothing." David slammed his fist on the armrest of his seat. "Damn! That could be where Rush is!"

"Lord David." Pagus spoke, putting his papers aside and stepping up closer to David, "Veyriel is certainly a lead, but we cannot confirm that is the place we want. We must keep our minds open."

David agreed, although he did not know how to keep his mind open, or to make himself think about anything other than Rush. Just Rush.

 

The talk with Duke Ghor did not go well. The man who dissolved the Academy said no information remained. Seeing as he was Duke Ghor, David was inclined to believe he did do his absolute best to destroy all research that had been done, illegal or not, just in case. Just bringing up the subject seemed to have rocked the usually good diplomatic relations between the two lands.

Already lacking sleep, the discussion drained what was left of David's energy but achieved little, though he could count one small victory: Duke Ghor trusted him enough to indicate that he was going to turn a blind eye on whatever David might do next, even if he was to make contact with ex-researchers. That meant he could speak with the Sykes without having to worry about causing them trouble.

David was about to dismiss Torgal and retire to bed when someone entered his office. "Lord David, is there anything else you need me to do?"

Emmy seemed exhausted. She was just like him, preferring to be physically doing something rather than sit with mountains of books or play games with politicians and nobilities. "That is all. Good work today. See you tomorrow."

Smiling, Emmy nodded, her attention shifting onto the other general in the room.

After a moment, David realised Torgal was also waiting for permission to leave. "You as well, Torgal. Thank you for today."

Unlike Emmy, Torgal did not smile. David couldn't remember when it was he last saw Torgal smile. "Lord David, the ministerial recess begins tomorrow."

David gasped; he had forgotten. "Have I - "

"You have done everything required. It has been a tough year, but you should be able to have a quiet eight weeks. The administration staff enquired about your arrangements, I let them know your usual summer retreat will be postponed until further notice. I hope that is agreeable."

"Yes. Thank you for arranging that."

David watched Torgal leave with Emmy. Did they often travel together? He wasn't sure. Far too concerned with his own affairs and the management of Athlum after the war, he didn't really know what Torgal and the other generals had been up to recently. The summer recess should be a time for them to step back a little from state affairs and take a break, but of course David would use this opportunity to devote himself to the search for Rush - and he would expect his generals to support him. Torgal had already predicted that.

David chewed on his lower lip, feeling slightly guilty. But this was Rush's life they were talking about.

There was another knock on his door. "Lord David?"

"Emmy?"

The young woman smiled brightly at David. Torgal was beside her, not much of him visible through the door frame. "Rush is our friend too. We also want him back."

It was the upside, and also the downside, of being surrounded by people who knew him so well. David dipped his head, unable to say anything except, "thank you."

"Then, good night!"

> Emma never married and the identity of her child's father was a secret she took with her to the grave, although there were rumours that David Nassau and Emma Honeywell II were half brother and sister, a claim so outrageous that David found it more amusing than aggravating. His parents were so devoted to each other that his father could not possibly have laid his hands on another woman. But he could see the reasoning behind the rumour: Emma did choose to risk the ruin of her personal reputation rather than reveal who the father was.
> 
> The image came into focus, showing Emma's grave. Emma was buried in her family graveyard, so Rush must be at the Honeywell's. Unlike her predecessors, married couples who were buried side by side, Emma's headstone stood alone. There was a space beside it. Perhaps one day it would be used, most likely it would not.
> 
> "Old lady, how're you doing? Sorry I haven't been visiting, it's been really busy, but I bet you know that already.
> 
> "I really miss you. I wish I made more visistones of you when you were around. I've got some somewhere though. Got one of you pms-ing and going apeshit over something really minor. I hid that one in Dave's room, maybe he'll find it one day and have a laugh. And then he'll realise I'd snuck into his room. Oops."
> 
> A sigh.
> 
> "You knew, right? Was that why you didn't want me to stay behind in Athlum?
> 
> "Hmm... nah, I guess not. You'd have told Emmy. Emmy wouldn't even have let me in here if she knew. She'd have killed me....
> 
> "I suppose there's no point in thinking about it now. But you were awesome, lady. If we all go somewhere after we die, I hope I end up at the same place as you. But maybe you don't want to see someone like me anyway."
> 
> Rush quieted down when there was the sound of foot steps. When he turned around, he pointed the visistone to the ground, but the long, long shadow was instantly recognisable.
> 
> "Oh, hiya," Rush greeted, then turned off the visistone.

Desperate to find the lost member of their family, the Sykes came to Athlum as soon as summer break began for Irina, bringing with them all the research they had done that Ghor did not know existed and therefore could not destroy. Looking down at the boxes of paperwork, Rush's father shrugged helplessly.

"We can never be convinced that Remnants are inherently evil," he said, "and it's hard to let go of a lifetime's work."

David wondered how Duke Ghor thought about this. After witnessing what the Remnants did to Wilfred Hermeien, and the war with the Conqueror, Ghor could be forgiven for doing what he thought was the best thing. But to those who had devoted their lives to the research, the complete dissolution of the Academy and criminalisation of Remnant research would only be seen as a betrayal by the authorities, one that would drive them to work underground. Even before the war ended, the Third Committee had already made Leithion's Sword, a Remnant they claimed to have created entirely by themselves. Without proper direction and regulation, it was likely research would end up being funded, and the results wielded, by unsavoury types. The results could be catastrophic.

No, David did not believe further Remnant research was the solution. Remnants should not be created by Men. But surely something else could be done with the decades of knowledge brought about by the research. To lose a group of top calibre scientists just like this was a complete waste.

At the audience chamber, David shared this thought with Torgal. He was only half way done speaking when Torgal started nodding, but the man listened to his lord all the way through anyway.

"I will include this in our submission for the points of discussion at the next Congress meeting."

Narrowing his eyes, David studied Torgal until the sovani's ears turned outwards by several degrees.

"You have already thought about this, haven't you." When Torgal looked at him in surprise, David just laughed. "Have you ever heard that the younger a person is, the better they are at learning languages? I appear to have mastered the facial and body language of the sovanis. I wonder why that is?"

Torgal said nothing, but seemed amused and thoughtful at the same time.

"Anyway," David waved his hand once, "yes, do include this in the submission. I guess you have already drafted an accompanying compendium, hmm?"

"Yes..." Torgal had the grace to look slightly embarrassed.

"Then that is one less worry for me. I am going to speak with Rush's family. You may go." David rose from the throne then went down the steps, taking two steps at a time, walking briskly towards the door. But when he passed by Torgal, he slowed down a little. "Thank you," he said, then left before Torgal turned around.

Rather than speaking out sooner and treating David like a boy who could not consider the bigger picture, Torgal had waited for him to realise the problem. Perhaps they were both trying to find that balance. David had hopes that they would get there one day.

 

The two Dr Sykes were given a room where they could go through their work to look for clues. After asking around, David found Irina at his mother's garden. She was surrounded by a surreal luminance.

"Irina?"

The light faded. "Mr David," Irina turned around and shuffled her feet. "I hope you don't mind that I've come to the garden..."

"Not at all." He walked closer, stopping half way under the short pergola. "I saw a light just now."

"I'm trying to see if I can feel where Rush is."

"You are using Marion's Blessing?"

"I tried before in Eulam, but I couldn't feel anything." She sighed, tucking a lock of hair behind an ear. "But Eulam is very far west. If I try here maybe I can reach further east. And this is Rush's favourite place in the castle, so..."

David didn't know that.

"Irina..."

"He's my brother, Mr David."

"I know you have made up your mind. I won't try to stop you." He inclined his head. "But please remember to take breaks and not strain yourself. I know that Marion's Blessing is very demanding."

"Okay."

"I will not disturb you now. But I will send someone to check on you regularly."

"Okay."

Both of the Sykes siblings were as stubborn as each other, so David knew this was the best way to go. And Irina might really be able to help. Even if there wasn't a trace of Remnant left in Rush anymore, this was a chance David was not willing to give up on. But he could just nag again.

"Lunch is in an hour's time."

"I will see you then."

Finally satisfied, David turned to go, but stopped all of a sudden, having thought of something.

"Irina, why is this garden Rush's favourite place?"

Irina just smiled and shrugged.

> David was standing alone at his mother's garden, as he often did. He held his hands behind his back, a gesture perhaps too old for someone his age.
> 
> "Rush?"
> 
> The image jumped. Irina came into view. She eyed her brother, suspicious.
> 
> "What are you doing?"
> 
> "Huh? Nothing."
> 
> She pulled a face, then took a peek around the corner they were hiding behind. "You're creepy stalker."
> 
> "I'm not! This is his special place. I don't want to disturb him."
> 
> "So you just stand here and watch his back?"
> 
> "It's not like that. It's just... every time I look for him he's busy."
> 
> "You're useless." Irina rolled her eyes. "I'll help you out, okay?"
> 
> "Sis!"
> 
> A hand tried to grab Irina's sleeve, but she already went ahead, turning the corner to enter the open-air garden.
> 
> "Mr David."
> 
> "Irina. Good evening." David turned around, looking somewhat subdued. His smile to Irina was very gentle; it always was.
> 
> "Am I intruding? Are you busy?"
> 
> "Not at all," David said, looking around them, "I'm just enjoying a very pleasant evening. Some calm before we travel tomorrow."
> 
> "If you want to take your mind off things, you should come and join us some time. Rush and I play card games all the time."
> 
> David was surprised. "I would love to, thank you for the invitation."
> 
> Irina was all smiles. "I'll let you know when we play next time, then."
> 
> There was a lull in the conversation. As soon as David's eyes settled back on the flowers once more, Irina gestured for her brother to come over, but Rush would not move.
> 
> "Not when you're talking to him," he muttered quietly to himself. Frustrated, Irina gave up after a moment.
> 
> "Hey, Mr David... is it okay to ask you about something personal? As a friend? You don't have to answer me if you don't want to."
> 
> David chuckled. "What is it?"
> 
> "Are you seeing anyone at the moment?"
> 
> He gazed at her. "No. How about you?"
> 
> "Me? Oh, no." She rocked back on her heels.
> 
> "I'm surprised. A girl like you must catch a lot of attention."
> 
> Irina shook her head. "I don't. And I don't really mind. Maybe in a year or two... who knows?" she shrugged. "So, what kind of person do you like?"
> 
> David gave the question some thought.
> 
> "It's hard to say. I think I will know when I meet her."
> 
> "So you don't..."
> 
> "Hmm?"
> 
> "Oh," Irina looked uneasy, embarrassed, and quite upset. Then she bowed her head a bit and hid her face from the visistone's, and her brother's, view. "I thought you might already have someone in mind."
> 
> Her words only earned David's chuckles. "If you were thinking about Emmy, you would not be the first."
> 
> At this moment, the image shook, darkened for a moment and then showed nothing but the purple fabric of Rush's vest.
> 
> "Irina! Dave! There you are!" Footsteps. A voice that had a smile to it. "Wanna play cards?"
> 
> Then the purple disappeared with the sharp sound of the visistone being snapped shut.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter makes reference to the sidequest "A Distant Promise".

_The small boy, holding David tight in his arms, ran when the bad ones got too close and their protectors could not force them back in time. Reaching a pair of doors, the one all these strangers first appeared from, he tried to walk through but a force stopped him. People chased behind, the ones who wanted to harm, followed closely by the protectors. Still cradling David, the child knelt down and then bent forward, sheltering him with his tiny body._

_Through the gaps, David saw the two women and their friends tear apart the bad ones, who simply vanished, leaving no blood, no corpses behind._

_"I suppose nobody will miss those rotten sods anyway." The smaller woman heaved a sigh. Satisfied that their work was done, the rest of the group left one by one, some giving the boy and David a pet on the head before going through the far doors where almost everyone had already gone into. Only the two women stayed behind._

_The smaller one crouched down and gave David a long, unreadable look. "I'm sorry," she whispered, then shifted her gaze onto the child. "We have to go. This is all we can do, but it's safe for you now. They're all gone. We'll all be gone."_

_"I can't go with you?" the boy asked, although it sounded like he already knew the answer._

_The protectors shook their heads. "You won't be able to." The other woman went down on one knee, and yet she still had to bend down to bring herself to the boy's eye level. She smiled reassuringly. "But he will come for you." Her eyes lowered, and she reached out towards David. Her touch was warm and very, very gentle. "I know you will come for him."_

_After that, they both shook hands with the boy. "Take care, both of you."_

_They walked their protectors to the doors. The boy reached out, trying to touch it, but just like at the other doors, a force repelled him. After giving them a final glance and a smile, the pair left._

_"Thank you, and farewell," David said to them, although he could not tell if anyone could hear him at all._

 

The first thing David wanted to do when he woke up was to weep from the acute sense of loss, like when he lost his parents, Emma, and Rush. Like when he stood in the town square, holding Emma's sword, seeing the sky above him empty for the first time. He sat up in bed, his heart numb with pain, and it was many long minutes before the details of his dream started to come back to him in bits and pieces. And then he had to tell himself to breathe, to smile, because even though it was only a dream, he knew nobody had died; they had only moved on.

It was still night. Shaken by his dream, David knew he was not going to get back to sleep any time soon, and so he dressed and left his rooms, going to the balcony outside the audience chamber, which gave a brilliant view of Athlum. The Valeria Heart used to glow at night sometimes, casting warmth and light on the castle it stood so close to. Even on the days when the giant sword remained dark, as if dorment, it would start to glow when David came to the balcony to look at it, as if acknowledging his presence.

He hoped Veyriel was a good place.

After a while, he decided to go and get some books to read in bed. If Veyriel was not a real place, like the Sacred Lands and what was beneath Undelwalt, then he would look at other possibilites, starting with mythologies.

He picked the longer route towards the library, taking a detour through his mother's garden. There, when he saw the figure of a young girl surrounded by a glow that was not the moonlight, he could not say he was too surprised. Not wanting to scare her, he let his footsteps be heard before he called her name.

"Did I not tell you that you must rest, Irina?"

The girl spun around on her heels. "Mr David! I felt something just now!"

That made David run over to her. "Tell me the details!"

"It didn't feel like a Remnant, but it has to be..."

"And?"

"I couldn't tell where it was..."

"But was it Rush?"

"I'm not sure, I couldn't..."

David stopped himself from grabbing Irina by the arms. "Could you try again?"

"Of course." Irina turned away from him, then held her arms out before her. Patterns of light began to appear on her skin as she concentrated, but it glimmered and blinked, then faded as she suddenly collapsed. David nearly didn't catch her in time.

"Irina?" He crouched down, letting her weight rest across his lap. Only now did the moon light up her face fully, allowing him to see how pale the girl had become. He should have known. In fact, he knew this would happen. She had already exerted herself beyond her limits, standing here so late after dark so that no one would know how hard she was working. And still, he pushed her to use her power!

Cradling her in his arms, David stood, holding her close. He took her to the nearest room with a bed. By the time he laid her down, she had started to come around. The first thing she did when she realised what had happened was to grimace and poke her tongue out.

"Oops."

"My sincere apologies. I shouldn't have pushed."

"No, it was my fault... sorry for the trouble..."

She didn't seem very sick, to David's relief. He got a chair and sat down next to the bed, trying to play the role of her brother, filling in for Rush just for now.

"If you're not feeling well, you must let me know. You cannot push yourself excessively and you mustn't let anyone demand it from you. Including me."

"Like I said to you before - he's my brother."

"I know that. But think from my position for a moment - how am I going to explain to Rush when he returns and finds you sick from exhaustion whilst staying under my roof?"

The logic seemed to finally be getting through to Irina, who cringed a little. "Sorry, you always treat me like an adult, but I guess I don't behave like one."

"The fault is also mine." David shook his head once, slowly. "We can be here all day making apologies to each other, so shall we stop now?"

They both smiled.

"Take some rest, and then see how you feel. I will go and let someone know you are here, they will bring you breakfast in the morning," said David, getting up.

"Mr David?"

He paused. "Yes?"

"Are you all right?" Irina blurted out, then checked her words. "I mean, you seem a bit down."

He tilted his head. She sat up, smoothing down her rumpled clothes.

"I'm asking... you know, as a friend. We're friends, right, Mr David?"

Her words surprised David. As someone who dragged her beloved brother into one battle after another, who prevented her from helping Rush at the most critical moment, who forced her to witness their powerlessness and bear its consequences, to hear what she said just now was something David never expected, and something he was grateful for.

He sat back down. "If we are friends, then would you address me just as David?"

"Of course." Irina's smile widened. The boundless energy of a teenager meant she didn't even look like she had passed out a few minutes ago. "Is everything okay, David? It's weird to be wandering around the castle at this sort of time."

"Well," it was difficult for David to explain the recurring dreams, but for Irina he would try. She was very likeable, incredibly strong-minded, and she was Rush's sister. "I have been having some bad nights. Sleep is a little hard to come by."

Irina's brows knotted. "If you are stressed, then perhaps you should take some rest too, like you told me to."

"But the search for Rush cannot be delayed," David wanted to say, but he realised Irina had just caught him out; neither of them could possibly just put Rush on hold. Instead, he tried to step around the point. "It's not related. Recently I have been dreaming about people I have never even met; it's nothing to do with Rush. But of course, I'm doing everything I can to search for him."

It didn't look like she believed him at all, but she just breathed out deeply, dropping her shoulders and smiling. "Rush would be really happy to know that you care about him so much."

"He has saved my life, Athlum, and the world. He is also my best friend," David heard himself explain.

She looked at him. He couldn't tell if she was waiting for him to say more, or maybe she was hoping to hear something different, but he met her gaze squarely until she looked away first, and nodded.

As a ruler, he had long ago mastered the survival skill of lying with his eyes wide open.

 

Despite the staff once again falling over themselves trying to get him into a coach, David had chosen to walk; the Honeywell residence, built on the same hill as Athlum Castle, had historically served as the castle's final line of defense. The walk down only took a half hour and the route was scenic. Besides, after not having slept much the night before, he appreciated the fresh air.

No one would ever dream of keeping Lord David outside the gates. The household staff led him into one of the front rooms, then went to get Emmy, who appeared from a different part of the house. It seemed like his early visit hadn't dragged her out of bed, fortunately.

"Lord David! Good morning."

"Good morning. Sorry to have come so early, and unannounced."

"What is my lord talking about? You're always welcome here." Her gaze lowered to the bouquet David held in his arms for a brief second. "I was about to have breakfast. Would you join me?"

Catching a hint of unease in the voice, David inclined his head to a side slightly. There should be no reason for her to be reluctant to let him visit Emma right away, but Emma was her mother, he could not insist. "If this is inconvenient, I will come back another time."

"Not at all!" Her gaze flicked to the side for a fraction of a second; she was coming up with an excuse. "There's some maintenance being done. The trees need cutting back a bit. But they should finish quite soon."

The lie wasn't half bad, David thought. He smiled, amicable. "I see. In that case... what's for breakfast?"

They shooed all the servants away and dined in private, which would probably fuel the rumours about them, but neither liked to eat with people looking over their shoulders.

David studied Emmy. She was, in every way, ideal for marriage. She was someone who could fight alongside him, and who could understand his burdens. She had a heart as kind and as strong as her mother's, and beauty possibly unrivalled by anyone in the land. She had the love of Athlum's people. As the matriarch of the Honeywells, even though her parentage was unclear she was still of the correct status.

They had known each other since they were children, enjoyed each other's company. As a child, David had always assumed he would marry her, because the whisperers and his uncles and aunts said so. Despite the gossip that they might be blood-related, people still practically treated the two of them as betrothed. He found the idea far more pleasant than being made to marry someone he probably would not meet until the wedding day just because she was of the right ilk.

But he was a grown-up now, and the times had changed. These days it was not unusual for nobles and common folk to marry. But that did not mean Emmy was not still a very suitable candidate. If they did wed, he should be quite happy, even though he didn't love her.

David could not be totally sure how she thought about this, but his guess would be that she didn't feel for him either. As children they did, however, agree that if neither of them found someone they loved, then they would marry each other. Although it felt more like a joke now, it was something that remained on David's mind.

Half way through his food, David lowered the cutlery. With no one else present, he decided he could lose the formality. "So."

"Yes?"

"How close am I to having to do the painful thing of proving my relatives correct and marrying you?"

She glared at him.

"Surely there are good men out there. Are you being too choosey and not giving them a chance?"

"I could say the same to you. Why don't you find someone to go out with?" Emmy pulled an unimpressed face.

She probably didn't mean what David was thinking, but her words made him sigh. "It is because of me that no one dares to approach you, isn't it."

Emmy waved dismissively. "If they're the type who let rumours stop them then I don't want anything to do with them anyway."

"No, Emmy. I know I am getting in the way of your chances of happiness."

Very smoothly Emmy rescued the conversation before melancholy could take over David. "That's not true. But if you must think that way, then find some happiness of your own. That would stop the rumours, wouldn't it?"

An eyebrow raised, David gave her a look that said, "you're good at this." She answered with a childish grin. Then, pushing her plate aside, she put her elbows on the table and rested her head in her hands.

"So, how close am I to having to do the painful thing of marrying you?"

David looked at her in the eye, just as he looked at Irina before, but this time he spoke the truth.

"Very close," he said with a smile, then pushed his chair back and stood, picking up the bouquet he brought for Emma. "Is it okay for me to go now, or should I wait longer?"

Emmy stood up as well. "David, have you given up?"

"On what?"

"On finding a companion! I know that..." she sighed and shook her head, the long hair that framed her face swaying with the movement, "...I know that you still mourn for her, but that happened when you were what, fifteen? You're twenty-one now! Don't you think she would've wanted you to have moved on by now? You have so much life ahead of you, but you talk as if you've already given up all hope, you never give anyone a second glance..."

David took a deep breath. "Emmy..."

She wasn't going to let him speak until she was done. "If you're going to be this way, then I'll start arranging dates for you. Trust me, I will!"

He managed a smile. "Do you abhor the idea of being my wife so much?"

"David!" she growled.

He felt resigned. "You are mistaken. These days I hardly think of her." He turned to face her fully. "What if... I do love you and wish for your hand? Would you accept me, or reject me?"

The words made her gasp, and the solemnity in his tone made her freeze on the spot. He put down the flowers for her mother's grave, and approached her with deliberation. He placed a hand on her cheek, leaning close, but she still did not move. Then he stopped, his lips just short of touching hers.

He couldn't do it.

Finally she recovered from the shock and shoved him away, stumbling back at the same time.

"How could you? You don't... you don't really..."

David dropped his hand and closed his eyes briefly. "No, I don't."

It was Emmy's turn to step foward. "What's wrong? This isn't like you at all."

He stole a glance at her, biting back a bitter smile that was threatening to form. "I should ask you that. Why did you not slap me across the face?"

"Because I know you're not that kind of a person," she said, trying to meet his eyes. "Just what is going on?"

"I was curious to know if you had any feelings for me." David once again took the flowers. "I apologise for the choice of method, I just thought that would yield the most honest answer."

"What?"

"I should go and apologise to Emma as well. Would the other visitor have left by now, or should I wait?"

Realising that David had seen through her small lie, and evidently not wanting him to see who else was visiting Emma, Emmy was forced to let the matter drop for now. "I'll go and check," she murmured, perhaps angry, or embarrassed, or worried, or all at the same time. She headed for the door.

"I am very very sorry, Emmy."

"Maybe I should start arranging those dates for you."

"Maybe."

> The staff at the castle loved the funny, polite and easygoing young man who had become their lord's closest friend. Occasionally one could hear them discuss how wonderful it was that Lord David was no longer the only male mitra of his age in the castle, and how the company would surely help take the edge off the Lord's intense day-to-day life.
> 
> Rush had been given permission to access the private areas of the castle since a long time ago. As such, nobody batted an eyelid when he headed towards the Lord's chambers one morning, although the sky had only just started to brighten. The visistone showed familiar corridors and hallways as he made his way towards David's suite.
> 
> The door opened without a sound. Rush snuck inside, then closed it behind him. He made it to the bedroom, and chuckled under his breath when he saw that David was asleep. Walking over, he put the visistone down near David, who was lying on his side, his hair falling over his face.
> 
> "Dave," Rush called with a small voice, poking David's shoulder with a finger playfully. The only reactions he got were a soft sigh and a shifting of limbs under the blanket. "Davey Dave," he tried again, half singing the name. This time David did not even stir.
> 
> After a moment, Rush brushed the hair away from David's eye, and held his hand there for a second. The eyepatch that should only materialise when summoned by David appeared under a green light from Rush's hand.
> 
> "Hi there," he whispered. "The name's Rush. We've sort of met before."
> 
> "No, I'm not trying anything."
> 
> "I don't know where he's taken Valeria Heart. Look, I'm not on anybody's side."
> 
> "Wanna make a deal? If you let go of his soul, I'll give you what I have. I don't know if I have anything human in me, but if any soul'd do, mine's got some awesome powers. Whaddya think?"
> 
> "No! It's because he saved my sister. Don't laugh; it's not funny."
> 
> "I can't take you. He'd hate me. And he'd kill me. Like, literally. And lots of times. Are you sure you can't just release him without me doing that?"
> 
> "Huh. Yeah, I could do that. I carry the tablet on me all the time. Would that... you'll know if it's me, not the Conqueror, right? Sorry, that was a stupid question. You sure that's okay?"
> 
> "Right. Thanks for talking to me, I appreciate it."
> 
> After moving his hand away, Rush knelt down by the bed, folding his arms on the mattress and resting his chin on them, his eyes on the man who was oblivious to the exchange between his best friend and his Remnant just now. Rush poked at his shoulder again.
> 
> "Didn't think you'd be such a sleepyhead. I could've stolen your Remnant just now. I could... do lots of things." He fell silent then, slowly bringing his face nearer to David's until they were close enough for their breaths to mingle, his lips just short of touching David's.
> 
> After a moment, he pulled back, pensive. Then, as if a thought came to him, he left for a while, returning with a pen in his hand.
> 
> "'Pervert'." Grinning, Rush whispered, waving the pen just above David's forehead as if writing on it. "'Blond rulez'. 'I heart Irina'..."
> 
> Slack fingers dropped the pen. Feeling something land and roll off his face, David opened his eyes in slow motion, then widened them when he saw that someone else was in the room. "Rush?" He looked around, seeing the pen and the visistone. "I hope this is not what it looks like! What are you doing in my room?"
> 
> Rush's quick hand snapped up the visistone before David could reach for it, holding it up so that only David appeared in the image. "It's exactly what it looks like," he said, laughing as David rubbed his face to check for ink. "Chill, I haven't managed to write anything yet... I got some other blackmail material though. A better one."
> 
> David sat up quickly. "Such as?"
> 
> "Apparently somebody doesn't know what his own hand does when he's asleep."
> 
> David glared, but there was a hint of fear in his eyes.
> 
> "Yanno, I really should punch you for moaning my sister's name when you did it..."
> 
> In an instant, David relaxed completely. "That's not possible."
> 
> Rush's confidence wavered. "Why are you so sure?"
> 
> "Because I would never think of Irina in that way."
> 
> "Come on, I've seen the way you look at her."
> 
> "If I do like her in the way you are talking about, I would freely admit to it. But the fact of the matter is that I don't," said David. "Now... give me that!"
> 
> Rush jumped back just in time, not letting David snatch the visistone from him. Throwing back his blanket, David was ready to make a second attempt, but Rush took another step backwards.
> 
> "Geez, man, put some pants on!"
> 
> By the time David had glanced down at himself and confirmed that he was indeed dressed, Rush was already at the door, visistone still facing David and recording. Then he escaped, laughing the whole way out.
> 
> "He doesn't like her!"


	5. Chapter 5

_The two pairs of double doors reminded David of those he had seen at the Sacred Lands, except these were even larger, and seemed infinitely tall. The small boy sat facing one of these doors, the one where all those people came from before._

_"It's taking him long enough."_

_Yes, this was taking too long, David thought._

_The boy held him a little tighter. "Sorry, don't listen to me. It's gonna be okay."_

_David had his doubts. Not that he could voice them, but there was a possibility they would remain here forever. He couldn't have asked for a better companion to be stuck in this predicament with, but that was what they were - stuck._

_"I'm sorry there isn't anything I can do," said the boy who protected David, and David wanted to reply, "nonsense!" but could not._

_"Nonsense! - that's what you might say." Small laughter. The boy didn't sound nearly as young as he looked. "She said your other half will come, but if he doesn't, we can be lonely together. Might be better than being lonesome?" He laughed again. "Or it means you've gotta to put up with me forever, depends on which way you look at it."_

_"I don't want him to see me like this." Then the boy held David at arm's length. David was so light he floated above the boy's hand. "But I guess he really needs you. If he does get here, I'll give you back, okay? Then you'll be fine. You'll be okay."_

_The boy sat down, then fell onto his back. He let David sit on his chest. "You'll be okay."_

_"But how about you?" David wanted to ask, but could not._

_In that space, there was nothing except the two of them, and two pairs of doors, which stayed firmly shut._

 

The first things that met the eyes were pink petals.

The three of them stood together, stunned to speechlessness by the beauty. Before them was a circular area, leading to a flight of stairs straight ahead. All around, trees of a species unknown to David were blossoming, the delicate pink petals of the flowers lifted by wind from a source unknown, swirling in a magnificent dance.

"So this was where my mother and Dr Sykes met." Emmy stepped forward, her voice unconsciously dropping to a whisper.

"Mr... I mean, David, should I seal the door, just in case?"

David nodded, then Irina sealed the door they just walked through. Marshallton. This was a space created by ancient magick, Rush's mother had told them, much like some of the areas in Siebenbur. For some time she had hid here with a tablet that would enable someone to gain control of Remnants without binding them or the power of Marion's Blessing. There used to be a house at the top of the stairs, she had also said, but the house was the conjuration of a Remnant so it might not be there any longer.

She was right. Looking up, the stairs led to nothing. Even a Remnant protected by magick had disappeared.

There was no sign of Rush, either.

The three of them exchanged a look. They were not surprised, but were disappointed nonetheless. It was a long way to travel just to check, but this was a place deeply connected with Remnants and as soon as Rush's mother told him about it, David knew he had to come, if only to see for himself.

"Irina, how are you feeling?"

The young girl looked up at David, not understanding what he meant until his gaze shifted towards the door.

"I'm fine! The door is really easy, doesn't take anything out of me at all."

"Then, would you mind using Marion's Blessing here? But only if you feel up to it."

Irina nodded. "Leave it to me!" She ran towards the centre of the circular platform.

"Emmy, go and stand beside her, in case she overexerts herself." David said to Emmy. He knew she was looking at him, but did not meet her gaze. He hadn't been able to look at her in the eye since that morning at her home. If he had a choice he would have asked someone else to come with him instead of Emmy, but he could not deny her the opportunity to retrace her mother's footsteps.

"Yes, my lord."

The sight of Marion's Blessing being used was becoming familiar, but every time it happened David simply could not look away. This was the power that saved Rush. It was a truth, tragically proved by Wilfred Hermeien, that Remnants could consume people. The only possible reason why Rush had survived without being taken over by the Remnant he met in the Sacred Lands must be that he had Marion's Blessing as well.

Irina was beginning to tremble from the effort. David was close to telling her to stop when she pushed just a little bit harder, the light around her brightening so much it almost hurt to look at.

"I can feel something! Let me... just a bit more..."

Her companions hesitated. They waited for another few moments, then Irina let her hands drop, not resisting when Emmy held her by the tops of her arms. David hurried over.

"Irina?"

"It's exactly the same as the other time. It feels like a Remnant, but something's different. And I don't know where it is... it feels like it's right here, but also somewhere far away..."

Emmy stepped around and wrapped her arms around Irina, conveniently hiding from the girl the fact that David had clenched his fists. The girl was muttering with a shaking voice, asking where her stupid brother had gone. David kept his lips pressed together into a thin line.

Yes, where have you gone, Rush?

"My lord, let's get Irina back to the surface first."

Can you not see the suffering your absence has brought?

"My lord?"

David only just managed to contained his frustrated growl. "Yes, let's do that."

 

Irina was a very strong-willed, or put another way, a very stubborn girl. David arranged for Emmy and Irina to share a room at the embassy for that reason. When the door to the study opened in the middle of the night and Emmy marched her roommate inside, David could already tell the silly girl had tried to sneak out to go back to Marshallton.

"I think you already know what I would say, Irina, so I shall save my breath." He didn't look up from his work, but heard her embarrassed laughter. She was always very sensible except when Rush was concerned. He could empathise. "Now go back to bed."

The young women were nearly at the door when Emmy stopped. "How about you, Lord David?"

"I have some work to do. Go."

"Can I help at all?"

"No. I just need you to keep an eye on Irina; I do not wish to lose another friend," he said to his desk and the piece of paper he was writing in. "Good night."

"Then, good night."

As the door closed, Irina's voice could be heard, asking if David was angry with her. Emmy told her no, Lord David always got like that when he was working.

David was angry.

He had a hundred reasons to be angry with Irina and every single one of them was wrong, irrational, unjustifiable. Rush being a Remnant was not her fault. She did not tell David when she realised the truth, but she could not be faulted for that. She was not strong enough to defeat the Conqueror, Rush stepped in and sacrificed himself - but she was limited to only what her power allowed her to do, just like it was down in Marshallton. None of these was her fault.

He was angry, but not at Irina.

He had hoped, really, really hoped, that when the door to Marshallton opened he would find Rush there, sitting on the floor, grinning up at him and saying, "took you long enough, Dave!"

As hard as it was, he was going to have to take Irina back to Athlum. He had to assume she was wrong. Whatever it was she felt, it could not have been both in Athlum and Marshallton. It was also becoming both physically and emotionally too draining for her.

Jager had no more information to give, neither did Nora. Pagus had spoken with General Maddox and returned none the wiser. The Sykes worked day and night, contacting as many ex-researchers as they could, but there had been no breakthrough.

On the list he had written, every item had been crossed out. He was out of leads, out of options.

 

_As if he had sensed a change, the boy held David against him._

_"Don't worry, we're safe here. If anyone comes, I'll protect you. I'll fight for you. I've promised, remember?"_

_David tried to say something, but he had no voice. Nevertheless, the boy seemed to have understood that safety was not what was on David's mind._

_"Are you scared?"_

_Yes._

_"Lonely?"_

_That was a question David would never answer honestly, not even to himself._

_The boy chuckled. "I always thought you were invincible."_

_That was what David thought of the boy._

_"Turns out we're both liars, heh," said the boy. "Finally I learn a bit more about you. But it doesn't matter now, does it."_

_It does, David wanted to scream. But the boy only smiled at him sadly, and said nothing more._

 

"I knew I'd find you here."

David woke to Emmy's voice and a sense of complete disorientation. When he opened his eyes he expected to find himself at that space, alone with the boy, but instead he was in the study at the embassy in Elysion.

His eyes burned.

"My lord? David?"

Emmy reached behind her and locked the door, then rushed over to David, going around the desk so that she could go down on one knee beside him. "Is everything okay?"

It took some time for David's attention to return and his eyes to focus. All his sensations seemed to have slowed. "Of course. Why do you ask?"

Her brows knotted. "It's just that..."

Only now did he notice the reason for the heat in his eyes. He turned away immediately. "It is nothing. Go and get ready, we leave in an hour's time."

"No."

"I just said that you are to go and get ready."

"I just told you I'm not going to."

Sometimes David forgot how stubborn Emmy could be. "Would you not allow me a little dignity? Or is this your revenge for what I did last week?"

"No!"

"Then do as I say, General Honeywell!"

Emmy gasped. "Why are you talking like that? You've never..." her voice softened when David covered his eyes with a hand, scowling as if the light was hurting them. "You haven't been the same since the war ended. If there are things troubling you I want to help you with them! Is it Rush? Is it losing the Gae Bolg? Pressure from the Congress? Is Torgal being too pushy?"

It was curious that she should bring up Torgal, but he was, indeed, a source of David's comfort as well as stress. It would not be a surprise if she knew the issues involved very well, given the realisation David recently had. "Torgal?"

"He knows he's causing you a lot of stress. But he promised your father at his deathbed to look after you."

"I know that."

"And he's a two-hundred-year-old man. We're all babies in his eyes. He can't help it, I think so anyway. It's not just you, he treats me the same way."

David's hand moved away from his eyes to massage his temples. "But he has a good reason to treat you so." He stole a glance at her. "Emmy..."

"Yes?" She seemed suddenly worried.

"During my years as the marquis, there was a bill that was put before me twice, and twice I rejected it. I didn't even allow it to be debated in parliament. You know which bill I am talking about, do you not?"

After a moment of shock, Emmy nodded.

"So why are you still so kind to me? It was I who prevented your parents from enjoying the happiness and honour every man and woman deserves. I threw out the interracial marriage bill on the grounds that although we cannot prevent interracial births, we can discourage it by not recognising such marriage until there is concrete evidence that children would not die prematurely, and that monsters would not be created. Yes, 'monsters' was the world I used." David drew a deep breath through his mouth. "But the evidence has been here, right in front of my eyes, for twenty-one years! Why did no one say a single word to me? Or was I as deaf as I was blind? Yes, that must be the case!"

"It's not like that..."

"Stop. I know what it is you want to say." David rose from his chair, gathered the things on the desk and made his way towards the door. "I apologise for shouting. We return to Athlum today. Go and get Irina ready."

A hand grabbed his arm. "This isn't like you. Talk things through with me! Don't just walk away!"

David stopped. If she must see the roots of his failure as a leader and a friend, then he would show her. She deserved that much.

He began after a shaky breath. "I know why it was kept from me - the evidence is indeed still not complete. I know that Emma and Torgal must have understood the risks. I know a marriage certificate would be nothing but a mere piece of paper to them in any case. I know all that." David pulled slightly and Emmy released her grip on him. "To me, however, the point is that I have been oblivious to the needs and the suffering of the people around me. It was that way with your family, it was that way with Rush. I took their loyalty for granted, basked in their love, but gave nothing in return. I failed to see what was happening. And then I sent them to their deaths."

"You did not send them to die," said Emmy. She was close to pleading. "My mother and Rush died doing something they chose to do, what they believed in!"

David opened the door with one hand. His other hand held the visistone he watched last night. One of the last ones Rush had made.

"But did you know how hard it was for them to make that decision?"

Emmy could not answer that question. He left the study.

> "What's up, emo kid?" Nora came to the table and sat down.
> 
> "I'm the cheerfullest thing you've ever seen!"
> 
> "Sure." Nora snorted. She put an arm on the table, a hand snatching the food menu that was held up by the salt and pepper shakers. "Hell, I'm hungry." She eyed the visistone. "What are you doing with that thing?"
> 
> "I'm just taking videos - "
> 
> "Turn it off!"
> 
> " - so that... oh, sorry."
> 
> She rolled her eyes to one side to look at him. "So that what?" She put her hand on Rush's before he could reach for the visistone.
> 
> "Nothing." A pause. Nora glared harder. "Just something to remember my friends by."
> 
> Her eyes narrowed, scrutinising. David could imagine Rush turning away at this moment, a half pout on his lips, defensive. The image was moving, as if Rush had taken the visistone in his hand, but Nora snatched it away from him and put it down again.
> 
> "Just don't point it at me when I'm eating. Anyone with a bit of sense knows you don't take pictures of a woman eating."
> 
> The image cut off, then resumed. Rush was still out of view. There were empty glasses on the table. Nora was drumming her fingers on the wood. "I don't really have anything to say."
> 
> "You don't have to. We can just chat the way we always do."
> 
> A smile danced on Nora's lips. "You know, you're the only one who isn't even vaguely afraid of me."
> 
> "For obvious reasons."
> 
> "No, nobody else knows what I am. It's just that I was already a rough bitch before the experiments." She shrugged. "I'm tight with the other Ladies, but it's not the same. We don't 'chat'."
> 
> "Maybe you're just too awesome for them?"
> 
> There was a gentleness in Nora's eyes, as if to say, "it is you who is awesome," but it was gone in a second.
> 
> "How was your trip anyway?"
> 
> "We saw the God Emperor." The tone of Rush's voice changed, becoming frustrated. "Dave's gonna make an announcement soon. The God Emperor is on the Conqueror's side. Nobody's allowed to do anything."
> 
> "What the hell?"
> 
> "Yeah."
> 
> "He isn't going to take it lying down, is he?"
> 
> "Anyone who tries to fight back will become a traitor. He's gotta think about Athlum."
> 
> "Fuck."
> 
> "They'd already tried to take the Gae Bolg when we were at the Bases. If the Conqueror tries again, I think... they're gonna kill the person it's bound to first." Pause. "It's what I'd do."
> 
> Nora drew a breath through her lips. "Have you told him?"
> 
> "No, coz he's gonna say 'that is better than having all my people suffer the consequences of having a traitor as their Lord.' And then say something about the Generals being able to carry on without him. Something like that. I know he will."
> 
> "Then?"
> 
> "His Remnant... you know, the one that calls out the Gae Bolg... she told me to take her if the Conqueror does come. She said she'll cooperate. I can hide her in Marshallton. But Dave's gonna think I'm on the Conqueror's side if I do that. And then. I can try to explain to him, but if he knows I'm the same as the Conqueror his only choice'd be to kill me anyway, because this is more than just about me. He has to do it for Athlum. If I don't explain... I just keep seeing his face, thinking I've betrayed him. I guess he'd be right, coz I did promise I'd fight for him.
> 
> "But I could. I could do exactly what the Conqueror's doing, and try to get to the Remnants before him. I've already got Rubber Soul and Schianova . Then I'll fight him and turn him into a talisman too, if he doesn't kill me first. Then I'll hide them all and stay with them. And then I'll be... you know, the new Namul Sin and Niram Sin. Maybe I can bind them all to myself. If Dave hates me for it then he hates me for it. But. He promised me he won't get my family mixed up in this, but if he thinks I've betrayed him, then... and even if he doesn't, someone else might try to use my mum and Irina to get to the Remnants." The hands on the table clutched together, shaking nervously. "Or I could go with the Conqueror and not betray my own kind and my purpose. Negotiate. Get them to leave the people alone. But I don't know if that'll work. If just one of them doesn't want to... Gwayn killed so many people in just a few seconds..."
> 
> From somewhere, Nora extracted a small tin and a thin packet, and rolled up a cigarette with their contents. She offered it to Rush, but it seemed Rush didn't want one. She nudged him. "Go on, it'll help you calm down."
> 
> "I don't smoke."
> 
> "First time to everything." She lit up, then left the cigarette on the edge of an ashtray. "I'll get some more drinks. It seems like it's a bad night to be sober."
> 
> When she left the table, Rush picked up the cigarette with trembling fingers. He coughed a little, but soon got the hang of it. The image became hazy as a faint cloud of smoke came in from the side.
> 
> Coming back from behind the visistone, Nora's hands came into view first, putting down several bottles of liquid with wedges of lime pushed down the necks. "You like that?"
> 
> "It's disgusting," Rush said, "but kinda nice."
> 
> "Like most things in life." She sat down and rolled another cigarette for herself.
> 
> Rush pondered on that until he finished the first cigarette in his life. A hand squashed the stub in the ashtray repeatedly in an obviously nervous manner. "In the worst case, if I run out of options... say, what'd happen if I... killed your Remnant?"
> 
> "I can't say. It's never happened to any of the Ladies." Nora took a long drag of her smoke, exhaling with the seductive elegance that was exclusive to female smokers. She watched Rush out of the corners of her eyes. "I'll die, maybe."
> 
> "Hmm." A dry laugh. "I thought so."
> 
> "But maybe I won't. And that's a chance I'd die for."
> 
> "Really?"
> 
> "Wouldn't you?"
> 
> "We aren't the same though. At least you know what you are and where it's all gone wrong..." Rush's hand reached for the drink. "...crap, why did I say that. I hate myself. Sorry."
> 
> Nora flicked her wrist. "I don't mind." She leaned forward. "Rush."
> 
> "Hmm?"
> 
> "I know you're thinking about it," she muttered, uncrossing her legs. "I've got one foot on either side and it's lose-lose whatever happens, so I suppose what I say doesn't mean much, but I'll still say this." She slipped away from her seat, moving to the very edge of the visistone's view. When she put her arms around Rush, cigarette still dangling from her fingers, Rush was tugged to one side a little, just enough to be captured by the visistone. "Nobody can blame you, whichever side you choose. Nobody."
> 
> He buried his face in her shoulder, his voice becoming half-muffled. "I'm the cheerfullest thing you've ever seen."
> 
> "I'm sure they believe that, darling."


	6. Chapter 6

_David couldn't tell how long they had been here for; the passage of time became hard to measure when one's surrounding never changed. He wasn't getting tired or hungry, and the little boy wasn't saying anything. They could have been here for a day, they could have been here for a lifetime._

_Eventually the boy got on his feet again, one hand still cradling David. He went to the doors at one end._

_"Instead of waiting for him to come, I can try to take you back," he told David, then held him closer to his chest. There was fear in his eyes: a fear of the truth. "You don't know till you've tried."_

_He pushed. His hand could not even touch the door. A force repelled him, keeping him away even when he threw the weight of his small body against it. David watched but could not do anything to help at all._

_Another eternity seemed to have passed. The boy took a step back, and another, and another, then crumpled onto the floor like a broken doll, staying still for a moment before sitting up again. "Sorry, I knew it wasn't going to work. I can't go where I don't belong."_

_He was crying._

_"Sorry. I didn't want you to see me like this. I'm just..." The boy breathed in, wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. When David saw his face again, he was already smiling. "I'm okay. I'm really okay."_

_Seeing the boy's well-practised, familiar grin, David wondered how many times it had already been forced for him._

_"You can get through that door, can't you? You know how to get home if I let you go, right? They said I should wait with you, but... I can't keep you forever, it's not fair on you. And he needs you."_

_The boy let go for David, his small, chubby hand shaking._

_"Go and live well, yeah?"_

_The chance was there, to be one again, to be whole. But David couldn't do it. He let himself sink in the air, coming to rest on the boy's hand once more. If he could, he would have smiled at the boy. Maybe he would even dare to touch him, let his fingertips brush the boy's short black hair, then tell him there was no need to force himself to smile any longer._

_"But... you..."_

_David stayed, unflinching under the boy's disbelieving stare. They would wait together. The women were right;_ he _would come for them, David was sure. He knew himself, after all._

 

Upon their return to Athlum, they were greeted by the news of Torgal having led out Blocter and two divisions of the rapid response troops because of a large amount of fiend activities near the Gaslin Caves.

"Why was I not made aware of this at the embassy?" demanded David, and Pagus responded in his clear but slow manner that David had come to love and hate, explaining that Torgal deemed the threat small and they did not need to tell David about it.

"And to stop me from worrying needlessly, I presume. But the number of men he had taken with him suggests this is something I should worry about!"

Everyone present cringed.

"For how long have they gone?"

"They left soon after you departed for the Numor Mines."

That meant four days. How many of what kinds of monsters would take them that long to eradicate? If only he had the Gae Bolg. He would gladly give a bit of his soul in exchange for the safety of all those men.

"My lord, now that you've returned, may I please go to the Gaslin Caves? Perhaps a bit of mystic art is what they need."

David didn't need time to consider. "I will go with you."

"Would that be wise? The citizens wouldn't like to see you in battle; it may give off a sense of crisis. Myself and a handful of men should be sufficient."

Anger was pushing forth; David wondered if he was getting short-tempered these days. "Because I no longer have the Gae Bolg, I am useless on the battle field?"

Standing to one side, Emmy and Irina gasped. Pagus, although similarly shocked, had a good handle on the situation.

"That is certainly not the case. But it's been hardly two months since the war ended and the people would not want to see their lord fighting again so soon. I don't think you truly understand just how much you are loved by the people."

But David did, and very well. He knew how very, very much everyone loved and believed in him. Emma. Rush. Even Torgal, who still would not stop comparing David with his father, loved him since he was a child and was learning to believe in him.

"That is the very reason why I will not sit here to wait for my generals and troops to return. I am going to them."

It was soon after that, when David was giving his sword and shield a final check, that the news of Torgal and Blocter's return came. After learning that few men sustained serious injuries, he took his time to shower and dress before going back to the audience chamber. This would allow the generals to fill each other in on what they needed to know, including David's reaction to Torgal's decision. This way, David would not need to say the same thing twice.

Silence fell over when David entered the chamber. He dismissed everyone except the generals.

Those two were wearing fresh clothes, David noted. The battle was fierce enough that they were too blood-soaked to stand before him without getting changed first.

He cut to the chase. "What are your conditions?"

Torgal spoke. "We are both well. Of the troops, seventeen have sustained minor injuries, and two serious. Miss Irina has offered to take a look at them."

"I assume Pagus has told you about our brief conversation before your return. I'll speak with you later. For now, Torgal, Blocter, go and take a rest. Emmy, the long journey back from Numor Mines has worn you out. Go home. Pagus, thank you for looking after matters in my absence. You may go."

The generals were more than a little shocked by the instructions they received. "My lord, I was going to see the injured men..."

"I will do that. They are my troops and I want to do something for them. Between Irina, me and other healers we have, nineteen are more than manageable. So go. Enjoy the summer recess. I don't want to see the four of you for at least a week."

Blocter was the first to pump his arm and leave. After studying David for a moment, Pagus left as well, although his gaze suggested he knew David wasn't doing this because he was in a good mood. Emmy lingered for a while longer, waiting to see what Torgal was going to do.

"Lord David, about your trip to the Numor Mines..."

"It was fruitless."

Torgal became quiet. Even his two-hundred years did not tell him what he could say to David.

"Go, and get the mending of your shoulder finished. It shocks me that you would even think I wouldn't notice it." It was something Emmy would see to, David knew for sure. They were trying to hide things from him again. Whatever their intentions, David was starting to hate this.

They were his generals. Loyal, faithful and caring. Despite Blocter's indiscretion about everything, Pagus's pedantic nature, Emmy's invasive questions and Torgal's inclination to be over-protective, David loved them with all his soul, even the part he no longer had. But right now he didn't want to see them at all.

> Having become accustomed to the sight of Rush carrying a visistone, David hardly paid it any attention when Rush came into his room with one in his hand.
> 
> "Oh, yes," he said, "there was something you wanted to talk about?"
> 
> "It's nothing serious." The visistone was left on a flat surface. Rush appeared in the image, hands in his pockets as he strode further into the room. "Just wanna talk a bit before we go tomorrow."
> 
> David inclined his head to the left. "Do you have concerns about our strategy? At the meeting - "
> 
> "No," Rush drew out the word, shaking his head and laughing lightly, "I'm not worried. I could take down the Conqueror by myself! You don't need to get Athlum involved in it."
> 
> David narrowed his eyes. "That is not a point for discussion. My reasons for marching are clear. Besides, I would never let you go alone."
> 
> The smile he received was difficult to read, as if Rush did not know how he felt about this. But he obviously knew there was no point in arguing.
> 
> "Well, anyway. What I want to say is," he breathed out, his shoulders sagging, an easy smile curling his lips, "thanks for everything. I meant everything I said this morning. If you hadn't been here, God knows what'd have happened to my family."
> 
> David looked away. "I can't accept your kind words. My original intention was to manipulate you because of your talisman's power. I've also failed to keep my word and got your family involved in this war." He took a few steps away from Rush. "If I deserve anything, it should be your anger, not your thanks."
> 
> "It's their choice to play a part. And you're a good guy, Dave, no matter what you wanted to do to start with." Rush shrugged. He went to a small table and half-perched on it. "But... could you still make sure my family will be safe from this war and whatever it brings afterwards? I know you've got lots of things to worry about already, but... I'll fight for you. I promise. I know I've already said this before, but I will. I'll do anything to protect Athlum, so - "
> 
> Although he was already dressed for bed, David didn't look any less authoritative than usual. He went over to Rush. "You _are_ angry with me for failing to keep my promise."
> 
> "No no no, I'm just worried about Mum and Dad and Irina. I mean, wouldn't you? If you have a sister like Irina, you'd be paranoid as well."
> 
> David bit back a sigh; he didn't entirely believe the explanation he was given. "If my words still hold any meaning to you, I promise you I won't endanger them in any way, and I will keep them away from harm."
> 
> "Thanks, Dave. Like I said, in exchange I'll do everything I can to protect Athlum."
> 
> "I'm giving you my promise because you are my friend. I don't need you to do anything in return." Grey eyes shifted. David stepped back a little, hands searching for something to fidget but found none, so they clasped together behind his back. "But after the war... I would very much like to... well, if you could consider staying by my side after this is over..." His voice, unusually timid, drifted off. When he caught the look of uncertainty on Rush's face, he turned away. "Ah, I should not have said that."
> 
> "Um." Rush seemed somewhat alarmed. "I can't.... I mean, like..."
> 
> "No, that is okay. That was too forward of me. I know it's not something you would consider."
> 
> "Torgal asked me the same thing. But who knows what's gonna happen, right? I just can't promise you. I'd love to, though. It'd be really cool if can I keep hanging around. I'll definitely do it if I can."
> 
> David's demeanor changed rapidly - Rush misunderstood the meaning of his question. He held back a laugh of relief, at the same time drawing on everything he knew about keeping a facade. "Do consider it, then, and let me know later. " He smirked. "If you're tired of battles, I can even find you a desk job."
> 
> "I'd choose to kill monsters any day!" Rush was laughing, but his voice became small and hesitant after a moment. "That's what you really mean?"
> 
> Freezing, David checked his body language. No, he shouldn't be giving anything away. He shouldn't have asked something like that when Rush's entire family was under his care. It was as if he was demanding ransom. In any case, Rush already had Nora. But the way Rush was speaking earlier made him realise how far they had come and how close they were to victory - or death, some might say, but David was fighting to win - and the feeling played a little trick on his psyche and made him say words that should never, ever be uttered.
> 
> He allowed himself to laugh. "What else can I mean?"
> 
> "I was just... it's nothing."
> 
> It was time to end the conversation. He could not afford to make another mistake, David decided. "You need to rest, Rush."
> 
> Rush's eyes were searching, looking around the room. "Actually, I'm kinda thinking, do you wanna chat?"
> 
> "What about?"
> 
> "Anything. Just chat."
> 
> "Rush, we're going to need all the rest we can get."
> 
> Rush shuffled on his feet. He nodded, looking defeated. "You're right."
> 
> "We can chat after we come back from the Sacred Lands. I'd love to... well, we are friends, are we not? But we haven't truly had the chance to enjoy each other's company yet. I do intend to take up your offer of a short stay at your home in Eulam."
> 
> When Rush nodded again, it was the way he did it whenever Irina had a particularly difficult request. "Okay. Just one last thing."
> 
> "Yes?"
> 
> Rush's hand extended, palm open, fingers gently curled. David looked down at it, then up at Rush again. The smile he saw was wry. Returning that smile, David clasped that hand in a firm handshake. Then, to his surprise, Rush tugged a little and pulled him into a hug.
> 
> "Thanks for everything. Really. You're awesome. The world's a better place because of you. My world's a better place because of you." A hand slid upwards to just between David's shoulders and slapped firmly a few times. "You'll win tomorrow."
> 
> "And I am a better person because of you." David returned the gesture. Rush must be nervous about tomorrow. David was, too, but he had years of training on how to handle the pressure. " _We_ will win."
> 
> Rush let go. His facial expression changed at lightning speed, becoming playful. Turning towards the visistone, he did a v-sign, grinning from ear to ear. Amused, David did the same for just a second.
> 
> "Now go to bed."
> 
> "Right. Good night, see you tomorrow!"
> 
> Rush looked like a man who had nothing more to worry about, and no regrets.

On the third day, instead of waiting for Torgal to come to him, David went to the Honeywell family graveyard in the early morning. Having asked the servants not to wake Emmy, he was the only one there, although he knew Torgal would soon come.

He had known something had happened in Athlum soon after the victory at the Nest of Eagles. Bound to the Valeria Heart, he somehow knew Emma was in danger. And then, all of a sudden, he felt his bond with the Remnant severed.

There was no explanation he could give to the others when the feeling caught him unawares and he fell from his horse, luckily only bruising a shoulder. Stunned and breathless, all he could say was they must make haste and return to Athlum. By the time they were just several leagues away from home, they knew what had gone wrong - the giant, sword-like Remnant was missing.

David could remember the way Torgal's face changed. Saying that he would go ahead to see what had happened, Torgal charged forward on his horse and no one could catch up with him. David did not even know it was possible for anyone to ride that fast.

By the time the rest of them made it back, Emma was very nearly gone, and Torgal was by her side. David, in his ignorance, intruded upon their final moment together. Even so, she had smiled, squeezed his hand and told him she had all that she could wish for, as a woman and as a servant of Athlum. Her only regret was not being able to kill the Conqueror.

Now, Emma lay six feet under.

David raised his hand, thumb and index finger pressing on his temples and his palm shielding his eyes. He did not move when he heard footsteps, when a familiar shadow stretched out before him.

"There is an ancient sovani myth, that the dead travel to the world beyond each carrying a large jar in their hands. The jar collects the tears shed for them by the living. The heavier the jar gets, the longer it takes for them to make that journey."

David chuckled bitterly. "I hope it's not true, because if it is, then my mother is probably still not at rest."

"She was very much loved by the people of Athlum."

"So was Emma."

Silence.

"How is your shoulder?"

"Emmy finished healing it soon after you pointed it out."

"I see." Pause. "I assume she told you what I said."

"Every word."

"How could you still stand the sight of me?" David asked, turning around to look up at that seemingly indifferent face. "I didn't even allow you the privacy when she lay dying!"

"If there was anything Emma and I needed to say to each other, we have had over twenty years' time to say it. You came just when she was asking me to look for you. She knew you had to hear her words from her mouth in order to believe them."

"But is that good enough for you? Speak frankly with me, Torgal. Are you angry with me? Was there anything I could have done that I failed to do? I forbade you from marrying the woman you loved. I left her here in Athlum, alone. She was killed. Do you not have anything you want to say about that?"

Torgal's voice was warm, his tone firm. "Yes: how was it your fault?"

David tore his gaze away. Even now, he was still enveloped in their love. Emma had no regrets. Neither did Rush.

"But how about Rush?" He had to fight hard to keep his voice steady. "That was my fault, was it not?"

"That is for him and his family to decide."

In front of the man who so fearlessly loved a woman from a different race and even had a child with her, David felt so small, so childish.

"I..." He took a deep breath. Some things were hard to voice when they had been suppressed for so long. And in the end he still couldn't use the right words. "He means very much to me."

Torgal nodded slowly. He understood what his lord meant. "I saw a few signs."

"I gave myself reasons not to do anything about it." In his fear, his cowardice, David kept himself away. He told himself his feelings were not true, that he would ruin their friendship, that Rush would shun him, that Rush already had someone else, that he could not pursue his own happiness at such a time. "But because I could not look at him in the eye in fear of giving myself away, I failed to notice how much he was suffering. I believed every false smile he gave me, pushed him away and sent him to work whenever he wanted to talk. I let him suffer alone.

"To go with the Remnants was to betray the people who brought him up and break the promise he gave me. To kill the Remnants was to betray his own kind and his purpose. It was to take his own life. He chose to take his own life! But even after that, I still tried to tell myself I never felt anything for him. I thought I was merely lonely and any companion would do. But the one I ache for is him. But there is nothing I can do now, is there? I've tried everything. I can't give up, but I don't know what else - "

Someone pulled David into a hug, not allowing him to speak any more. It wasn't Torgal. "Emmy," he whispered. He hadn't noticed her presence. "Emmy, I am sorry."

"You didn't even manage to touch me, silly." She stroked his hair, an arm squeezing David tighter.

"We haven't yet reached the dead end," said Torgal, his eyes on the children. "In the last few days I have located a few sovanis who have lived since before the era of Remnants. They may have answers to our questions. With your permission, I would like to go and meet them."

David cleared his throat, but Emmy would not let go of him. It wasn't as if he really wanted her to. "Can I go with you?"

"Sovanis that old are reluctant to meet with anyone, let alone someone of another race."

He should have guessed. He nodded. "Then, thank you for doing this for me."

Torgal left first. David stole a glance at Emmy when she finally took a step back, unsure what he could say. He did not intend for her to hear all that; he wasn't used to exposing his weaknesses to anyone, even those close to him. At first it was because he wanted to prove himself - nobody believed someone so young could cope with being the marquis, saying that he was bound to be manipulated and made into a puppet. Now, it was because he didn't know if he would be accepted. Perhaps they would see him as a coward. Perhaps they would worry about him. Perhaps they would think him mad, to love someone who was a Remnant and was now missing.

But to his surprise, Emmy was smiling at him.

"Why are you smiling?"

"Because I won't have to marry you," she told him, her smile turning a mirthful grin.

 

It was probably even harder for the Sykes to say the words than it was for David to listen to them.

They had completely no clue where Rush was.

David wanted to reassure them, but as someone who could barely maintain the appearance of calm, it would be hypocritical, if not impossible, for him to say any words of comfort. He was the person who gave these people hope, but he couldn't guide them at all. So much for being a leader.

Their discussion lasted several hours, going over the work Rush's parents and sister had done and deciding on what direction they could take from now on. They asked if they could meet the person who was forced to be fused with a Remnant, and reluctantly David agreed to make the inquiry. He really didn't want to put Nora through anything to do with Remnants at all if he could help it, but they were all desperate now.

When it neared midnight, David ran out of things to say and could not bear the sight of the loss etched on John and Marina's faces any longer. "Let's call it a day. I will make that contact in the morning and we will take it from there."

The Sykes all nodded, and the parents left first. David stayed, seeing that Irina had something to say.

"I've been using Marion's Blessing," she told him, looking sheepish. "I thought I should let you know before you find out and tell me off."

He smiled. "I knew you would not give up on that and solely aid your parents in their work. I have no objections to it as long as you take care of yourself."

"I will. I haven't felt anything since that time at the Numor Mines, but I'll keep at it. I think it's not related to the location anyway, since it also happened here in the castle."

David nodded.

"You don't believe me, do you?"

"I do believe you." He sighed. "And I admire your spirit very much. What I'm doubtful of is how useful this is. I... allow me to speak honestly: if we can't find out what it was that you felt, and where it is, there is nothing that can be done." He watched her bow her head. "I'm sorry. That was harsh of me."

"It's not. What you've said is true." She smiled at him. The way she could find the strength to keep smiling was very much like her brother. "I'll keep working on it and figure it out!"

David nodded again. Although every method of search had led only to dead ends, nobody was prepared to give up. "Like I said, as long as you take good care of yourself. We don't know if using Marion's Blessing is harmful in the long run."

He opened the door for her, but she hesitated and didn't step through.

"Actually, David... are you all right? Are you sleeping better now?"

He studied her. There was something she wanted to say, and depending on what it was, he wasn't sure if he was ready for this conversation. But he had already told Torgal and Emmy, and how far had denial got him? It only kept him from seeing the truth and filled his life with regrets.

"Is there something you are trying to say?" David closed the door once more.

"Well, I don't know if it's my place to say this, but I've heard some rumours. I suppose they're more guesses than rumours, actually... they say that even though you aren't bound to the Gae Bolg anymore, it could have had some permanent effects on you. I was wondering if that could be the reason why you aren't well."

"I see why people are speculating, but no, that is not the reason."

He could explain to her the nature of his Remnant, that Kellendros had no choice but to take some of his soul every time it was used because if it didn't do that, it simply could not conjure the Gae Bolg and produce so much power. When Kellendros was destroyed along with all the other Remnants, part of his soul indeed went with it, and he had accepted the fact that the length of his natural life had been shortened as a result. But for someone who had chosen to live with the consequences of using a Remnant, this was already a better outcome than anything he could have wished for. He would never speak ill of this gift Rush had given him.

"Then..."

"The last time you asked me that question, I told you I was being plagued by dreams, none of which were about your brother."

Irina nodded.

"Those were not honest words. I dream of him every night, that he is at a place with locked doors, waiting for us. I dream of him all the time. Physically I am well, but..." he paused, hesitated, then softened his voice to barely a whisper, "the longing is quite unbearable."

He fell silent.

After a long while, Irina spoke. "Rush kept pushing me to you. He even convinced himself that we liked each other." She laughed softly.

That was one of the many things David learned about only after Rush left. "If I had had the courage to speak to him, things would not have turned out this way."

"I know my brother. He would have kept his secret from you and made the same choice in the end. So please, don't blame yourself."

She was right.

"It's not just me; you need to take care of yourself too."

"Yes. I shall be heading to bed."

She stepped aside so that he could open the door.

"Good night, then. If you dream of my stupid brother again, ask him how we could get him back?"

 

This was the final visistone from Rush's bag, marked not with a date but with a simple "D" on its side. David held it, feeling its embossed edges press into the flesh of his palm, not quite daring to watch it. It was not that he was superstitious, that he thought these devices were in any way connected to the search and if he watched this last one then he would have no more time to find Rush. It wasn't that. But it was the last visistone. After he watched this, there would be nothing left for him to look forward to.

But fear had stopped him from getting close to Rush and understanding him before. He couldn't give in to fear again.

He balanced the visistone on his bedframe and let it play.

> There was nothing to see for a second, and then Rush appeared from behind, going to sit down in front of the visistone.
> 
> "Hey, Dave," he said, flashing his trademark easy smile, "if you've found this on your bed it means you've won the war and we're all still alive! Congrats!
> 
> "There's something I want to ask you. I thought about writing you a letter but I want it to be more personal, but to be honest I don't really have the guts to say it to your face in case you don't like what you hear. So have a visistone. I'm sort of talking to you in person but actually hiding in my room and packing my stuff."
> 
> He laughed, shifting a little as if he wasn't sitting comfortably.
> 
> "Dave, I... I like you. Not just as friends - also as friends, yeah, but I mean _like_ like.
> 
> "Would you go out with me?
> 
> "If you like the sound of that, come find me? If you don't come, I won't bother you again. No hard feelings. I understand. I'll go away quietly so that things won't get too awkward or anything and you won't need to see me again.
> 
> "But if your answer's 'yes', you know where to find me.
> 
> "That's all. I'm gonna turn this off before I say something really stupid. Bye!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually considered removing David and Irina's scene. It doesn't seem to do much in terms of plot and doesn't contribute much to the whole story in any way, and this chapter seems to be needlessly long... but I like the idea of them talking about Rush, almost like they were working out how to talk to each other. Hmm.
> 
> Also, I'd like to think that Rush was able to keep hoping for the best even though he knew it was all going to hell. He still thought there was a microscopic chance that it'd all work out. With that tiny bit of positivity, and driven by the knowledge that Dave didn't like Irina, that ambiguous question Dave threw at him about staying by his side, and also the fact that he'd got nothing to lose, he made that visistone before he left. Because he's Rush. :)


	7. Chapter 7

_There was a sovani saying, David remembered Torgal telling him once, that at the deepest level of Hell there was no fire, no torture, no punishment dealt by demons or devils. At the deepest level of Hell, there was nothing at all. The condemned soul's punishment was eternal solitude._

_If David chose to leave, it would be the same as banishing the boy to Hell. But that was not the reason why David would not leave the boy's side._

_The boy had put him down and looked away, waiting for him to change his mind and silently slip away. David remained in the spot where he was left, waiting for the boy to realise he would never leave him. Eventually, David's patience won when the boy turned around after what felt like days and saw that he was not alone as he had expected. David went over to him then._

_"How can I get you out of here?" he tried to ask, and although he had no voice, he was sure the boy understood his question. But the boy only smiled, shrugged and shook his head._

 

Torgal was three days late.

In the evening, after David sent his generals homeward, he went to stand at the balcony outside the audience chamber. From here he could see any carriage or horse coming up the hill. Although Torgal was someone who could handle any situation, it was uncharacteristic of him to be late and not send word back. David did not even try to disguise his worry.

"For someone his age, one would have thought he would be more responsible than this and at least send a message," David muttered under his breath before remembering that Valeria Heart was no longer there to listen to his concerns or share his joys. But before he could sigh, he spotted movement on the road leading up to the castle. Someone on a horse was stopped at a lower check point, and then allowed through. It wasn't Torgal though. Even at this distance David would have recognised Torgal. Despite that, he hurried down to the side entrance anyway, getting there just as the guards at the gate told the visitor that General Pagus had already gone home.

"What is going on?" he asked, striding closer as the guards saluted him. The man at the gate had not even bothered to dismount. It was someone he knew. "Jager?"

"Oh um, hey, Lord David."

Judging by the way Jager's eyes shifted, it didn't seem like the man wanted to see him. It was all the reason David needed to demand to know more, and he did this by pressing his lips together into a thin line and glaring at Jager. It took less than five seconds for Jager to change his mind.

"I er, meant to get the qsiti General... oh man, he's gonna kill me now."

David narrowed his eyes a little more.

"It's Torgal. He's really badly cut up. He told me to - "

David didn't need to hear the rest. Within minutes he was on his own horse following Jager down the hill. It didn't take them long to get to Warrior's Honor at the town centre, where the bartender was tending to Torgal upstairs, making him drink what smelled like a mixture of different healing herbs.

Torgal was only semi-conscious on the makeshift bed, the table cloth he was lying on already soaked through with his blood. Apparently Jager had found him just outside of town and brought him in here. Right away David unleashed all the healing mystic art he had on Torgal. Pagus was indeed the master of all mystic arts, but when it came to healing David was just as skilled.

When he finally managed to close all the wounds on Torgal, he allowed himself to sit down and rest, exhausted, watching sovani ears twitch, flatten, then stand fully alert.

"Do not," he began before Torgal even said a word, "even try to blame Jager for my presence here. Don't say anything; wait for the medicines to fully take effect first. And no, she doesn't know. But if you try to speak or move before I allow you to, I will make sure she finds out about this."

Torgal sighed lightly. "Thank - "

"I said: not one word."

They spent the next half hour in silence. The bartender and Jager left for a while, returning with fresh clothes for Torgal to change into and cleaned up whilst marvelling on how sovanis could survive even after such injuries. Eventually David sent them away, then turned towards his general.

"Torgal."

"Jager is a good man."

"That he is. I dread to imagine what would have happened to you if he didn't find you."

"I have had worse, my lord."

David knew he would say that. "You have had worse, but you were not alone then. I let you go on your own and this happens. What am I to do?" He let a smile play on his lips. "Should I follow you in order to always be sure you are all right?"

Their eyes found each other, and they both started to laugh, years of tension between them dissolving in an instant. It would be wrong to say they were alike, but they understood each other well - perhaps too well, so that they could not allow themselves to get annoyed or upset when the other did something they disagreed with, strayed too far or, sometimes, came too close for comfort.

But they could learn. There was time.

"Your wounds were not caused by fiends. Who is the fool who attacked you and made an enemy of Athlum?"

"It wasn't an attack," replied Torgal, sitting up. "The man I went to see would not impart his knowledge unless I promised him a good battle." He paused, and added, seeing David's eyes widen, "long before racial integration began, sovanis used to be a people of fighters. Some of the ancient ones still prefer their old ways."

"That is insanity," David uttered.

"That comment could be construed as racist, my lord," said Torgal.

David stood up. "No! Torgal, you are insane! You put yourself in mortal danger just to gather information? Have you lost your mind?"

"It was not 'just information'."

No, it wasn't. It was trying to save a friend, a hero, a man David loved. But that did not stop David from clenching his fists, wanting to punch the person in front of him, who was looking like he simply made the most natural choice.

"I have a request, my lord. Before I tell you what I learned, please promise me you will not act recklessly. It is something you need to approach with great caution, and that is if you approach it at all."

"How hypocritical of you to ask that of me." David forced down his wave of anger, feeling almost dizzy because of it - Emma, Rush, and now Torgal. Why must he be surrounded by such people? - and he had to put a hand on the back of a chair to steady himself. "But I can set a good example. You have my word. Now speak."

Torgal took a long breath and began.

It was something that was never confirmed, and could never be confirmed, but the old sovanis believed that Remnants were long-dead beings, possibly those who constructed Siebenbur, who had moved on to another world. As far as anyone could remember, Remnants came - or returned - to this world due to the actions of a mage, someone not unlike Wagram, who became obsessed with Siebenbur and the people who built it, and opened the way for them return using magick. This led to a period of great destruction, as the lingering emotions of the dead were not always good. They believed the world still belonged to them and whilst some could be appeased if worshipped, others simply would not stop. Men fought against Remnants, and Remnants with differing opinions fought amongst themselves.

"And then came Marion Marshall?"

"Yes."

"Remnants are deeply connected with magick. Wagram was able to call forth The Seven from Veyriel because of this?"

"Possibly."

"When she was being pursued because of the tablet, Marina Sykes hid herself in an area in Numor Mines that was locked by magick."

"Yes."

"And Nora also said that a Remnant was fused with her using magick. But magick is a dead art, long buried because of its dangers. The Third Committee members have been executed, and Wagram is no more."

"I believe Marion's Blessing is a form of magick as well."

Silence.

"You didn't want to tell me any of this," said David, watching Torgal. "Having listened to it, I am surprised that you chose to tell me at all."

"Perhaps I shouldn't have." Torgal's ears turned outwards.

David wondered what Torgal was thinking, what could have made him decide to be truthful about what he learned on his journey. He must have known that this knowledge may endanger his lord, because David would surely consider using magick to travel to the other realm, Veyriel.

"Rest here tonight; I'm sure Jager and Sir George can arrange accommodation somehow."

Torgal gaze followed David as he headed for the door. "Lord David, please remember your promise."

"I need to speak with Irina, then we will discuss this further," said David, his tone solemn and severe. "I am not like you."

"I am sorry for my behaviour."

"Your life is mine. If you dare endanger what belongs to me once more, Athlum shall no longer require your services and you can seek alternative employment."

"Yes, my lord."

 

It wasn't yet too late when David returned to the castle, not by his standards anyway, but he didn't go to look for Irina. He needed time to think about how to speak to her. How to ask her to, somehow, send him to a place that may or may not be the land of the dead. It would be unkind to demand this from Irina, who hardly knew her own powers and would likely bear the guilt for the rest of her life if she was unsuccessful or, worse still, if David could not return.

There was Torgal to consider as well, although David guessed Torgal already knew he would do it no matter the risks.

He spent the night putting his affairs in order. Just in case. That was what Torgal was asking of him, to not sacrifice Athlum in his chase for love and redemption. And he really wasn't a child any more, he understood his own limits as well as his responsibilities. Still, perhaps it was cruel. In the plans that were in place and reviewed annually, David had always named Emma Honeywell as the one to hold Athlum's reins should he die before having a successor. Now, that person was to be Torgal.

David tried to pen a personal letter to Torgal, but there were not enough words of apology he could use.

In the early morning he sought Irina out, finding her, expectedly, in his mother's garden, surrounded by that indescribably beautiful glow of Marion's Blessing. Instead of calling out, he made sure his footsteps could be heard. She turned around, her gaze fixed on him as he approached her with great deliberation, the light around her glowing brighter as he neared, until it became almost blinding. It wasn't something David had ever seen before.

"Irina?"

"Rush?"

Her response startled him. "Irina."

The light faded a little. "You're... David," she said, her lips trembling.

He inclined his head. "Yes, it's me. You must be tired. Have you been working through the night again?"

"No, I... just now, there was something, it's like that feeling I had before, but so much stronger," she was holding back tears of shock, "and it's Rush. I know it is. It's as if..."

"As if?" David asked when Irina's voice drifted off. She was afraid. "It's okay. Just tell me."

"It's that feeling. I was so sure you were Rush!"

David's mouth fell open.

"This doesn't make sense. I'm not helping with anything. You're right, I don't - "

Perhaps they were all just exhausted, but something about the way she described it made him question if that was all there was to it. "It's fine, Irina. Let me think about this."

Even as he spoke, pieces began to come together, every clue just on the edge of being intangible, forming a picture with no clear outline: Veyriel, a land that was not a part of this world; the true nature of Remnants, his contract with Kellendros in order to summon the Gae Bolg; his dreams - if those were dreams at all; Irina feeling Rush's presence through Marion's Blessing, and each time he had been nearby to witness it, but this was the first time he stood close to her as it happened.

Irina stared at David, all of a sudden looking every bit like the teenager she really was, rather than someone who had played an important role in the war. When David pressed his lips together and did not speak for a while, she shook her head, trembling. "It doesn't make sense. I must have just mistaken."

"It does make sense. Calm down. I know what's happening," David told her, hands gently grasping her shoulders. "Irina, listen. Everything is going to be okay."

His steady gaze and firm hold helped soothe her frayed nerves. She nodded, swallowing hard at the same time, waiting for David to tell her more.

"I have a request: I want you to use Marion's Blessing on me."

"Why? What would that do?"

"I don't know."

She gazed at him. He sighed.

"I'm not completely sure." His eyes flicked down to their feet. He could not lie to her about this. "I may go to sleep, perhaps."

It took her a moment to decipher his meaning. "No! I won't do that! But why would that even happen?"

"I will return. I want you to trust me, Irina. I will come back. With Rush."

"But I can't - "

"Torgal knows what is happening and he will look after things until I return. Please, do this for Rush. It's the only way."

He was scaring her, David knew. Or the whole situation was. However strong she was, it was unfair of him to suddenly put the weight of such a decision upon her. But he would get her to do it even if he had to go on his knees and beg.

But he underestimated her. When she lifted his hands from her shoulders, her own hands were still trembling. But by the time she took a step back and nodded at him, determination had already overcome fright. Holding the heels of her hands together, she stretched them towards David, fingertips just short of touching his chest.

"Promise me you'll come back with my brother."

Marion's Blessing surrounded them. David bathed in its light, feeling something lift inside him, one part of himself calling for another.

"I promise."

"Does your promise truly mean anything, my lord?"

Torgal.

He wasn't supposed to be here; he should be quietly recuperating rather than coming to the castle. David smiled bitterly, realising that Torgal had seen through him once again.

The man came to stand behind David. "You gave me your word that you would not act recklessly. You said we would discuss this together."

There wasn't much David could say. "All my affairs are in order; you won't need to clean up after me."

"Cleaning up after you is my job. Do you intend to put me out of work?"

"Torgal?"

Time seemed to pause around them. The world around David looked half-transparent, like coloured glass; he wasn't entirely here now. But he could still feel Torgal stepping up even closer behind him. He tipped his head back a bit so that he could see him.

"Take care and return soon."

At that moment, David understood. Torgal made him promise he would not jump into this not because Torgal resented being burdened with Athlum, but because he was worried for him. It was this simple: David was going to a place where Torgal could not follow.

"This is pay-back for your journey without me and nearly losing your life."

"Hn."

"You are right; I am still a child," he said to Torgal, smiling, eyes sliding close.

Then he let go, allowed the magick of Marion's Blessing to hit him with full force, knowing that Torgal would catch him when he fell.

 

 

He stepped through the double doors into the white room. A boy was sitting on the floor, cradling something in his hands as if it was the most fragile, most important thing in his life. The object had no shape or colour, yet David could see it and he felt something inside him yearning for it.

The boy stood up as David walked over to him.

"Hello."

"Hello."

"Who're you?"

David went down on both knees and then sat on his heels so that he was at the boy's eye level.

"My name is David Nassau. You can call me Dave."

"Dave!" The boy exclaimed, then extended his arms, holding the object before David. "This is yours. Kelly told me to give it back to you, she said she's off to Veyriel with Val and everyone so you can have it back."

"I see," said David, but he didn't take what the boy offered right away, and instead looked over his shoulder, to the doors at the other end of the white room. "Is that where they went?"

"That's Veyriel. She said that's home and they're going to be happy." A small hand took David's, handing the invisible item over. "Here."

David had never imagined this moment would come, that he would hold, in his own hand, a part of his own soul. A parting gift from Kellendros. Without this as a connection between him and Rush, he would not have been able to find his way here.

"Thank you. Thank you for protecting it."

The boy just smiled.

Holding his soul in one hand, David extended the other. "Let's go, Rush," he said, frowning when the boy didn't move. "Did you honestly think I wouldn't recognise you?"

For a second, it seemed like his facade was going to crumble, but Rush was able to smile again. He took half a step back, not taking David's hand, not even looking at it.

"I'm not going with you. I'm going to Veyriel as well."

"Is that so?" David drew back, standing up. "Go, then. Let me see you walk through those doors."

They gazed at each other in silence, and Rush was the one to look away first. "Just go, Dave. I'm really happy you've come, but..."

"I will not leave on my own."

"Dave..." Rush's face changed, expression coloured with a mixture of joy and heartbreak, something one would not expect to see on a child. "Thanks."

"So let's go."

"Please. Don't make me spell it out."

David arched an eyebrow.

Rush shook his head several times, not frustrated, just resigned. "Look at me. This is how old I was when it happened."

"I guessed."

"I can't go back. I ain't a Remnant now, so I can't go to Veyriel. But I haven't got enough human in me to go back either."

"I know. I saw you trying."

Rush looked slightly horrified. "You saw?"

"Yes."

"Oh God." Muttering something undecipherable under his breath, Rush's face became flushed, but he managed to meet David's eyes after a moment, and he even smiled. "Then you know I can't go with you. Look, it really means a lot to me that you've come all this way. I'm going to be fine here. You really need to go back now, there must be lots of people worried about you."

To leave Rush here was to leave him in Hell, but David didn't say that because that wasn't why he was here; he'd already told Rush the reason. Seeing no point in repeating himself, David took Rush's hand and led him towards the doors he came from. As they neared, Rush tugged on his hand, but his child's strength could not free him from David's grip. Finally they stopped before the doors.

"I didn't peg you as someone so sadistic." Rush looked up at David, his smile bitter. "You know I can't do this."

"I know you can," said David simply. "Try again."

When their eyes met, Rush seemed to calm down a little, nodding, wanting to believe what David said.

As Rush put his hands on the doors, distracted, David did what he had to do.

It was gone in a blink.

Ah, Torgal would call him reckless again if he found out about this, David thought with a smile.

The doors opened.

 

The surroundings were familiar. Even before he opened his eyes, David could tell he was in his bedchamber.

Was it all just a dream?

There was a surprised gasp when David sat up so quickly he nearly lost balance and fell off the bed. Then he realised he wasn't alone. Sitting by the bed to his right was Emmy. And to his left was...

After she recovered from her shock, Emmy just smiled, wiping away tears of relief before they had the chance to fall. She nodded when he looked at her, wearily rising from her chair, ready to leave, but leaned forward when David beckoned her.

He kissed her on the cheek, letting the gesture speak for him.

After Emmy left, David turned towards the glass-like form beside him, which lay curled on its side facing the other way, watching it solidify before his eyes. He bent over the body, letting his head rest against the chest, feeling it rise and fall, feeling it breathe.

It wore the same clothes it did the day the Conqueror was killed, torn and battered by battle. It smelled of sweat and blood and dirt, as if it had only just returned from war. David took a deep breath.

Yes. Right here.

He felt the body rousing, but did not move away.

"Dave?"

The voice made vibrations against his cheek. In the background was the strong, rhythmic thump of a heart. The feeling made him giddy.

_Alive._

"Rush."


	8. Epilogue

_David has returned to us for three days after having left for the same. I have been far too busy during this period to sort out my thoughts, let alone to pen an entry._

_How David achieved the feat of bringing back Rush Sykes is not something he would explain to me. I have asked Irina, who said that she also did not understand why using Marion's Blessing on David could have led to this. Though, as I stood outside his bedchamber upon hearing the good news, voices could be heard, young Rush apparently upset with a choice David had made. It makes one think that a sacrifice had been made in order to facilitate the return. Even though David would not speak on the matter, I know the truth will come to me in time._

_With Rush's return, one gets the feeling that the war is truly over. Peace, so hard-won by each one of us, finally goes beyond a mere concept and settles into our hearts. I know that Emma is smiling as she watches over us._

_David has entered talks with other lords regarding Rush Syke's future. Depending on its outcome, I can perhaps consider accepting the invitation Allan made a few weeks ago. I am delighted that he thought of us. The idea of_

"Torgal."

Torgal put down his pen and stood. "My lord." David looked weary, but the way he held himself suggested to Torgal he was happy. "The meeting is over?"

"Yes, finally. Lord Ghor and Lord Qubine are on their way home."

"It has gone well?"

David nodded. "Everything in our favour."

"Congratulations." The outcome wasn't unexpected, but Torgal was still relieved.

"Thank you." David eyed Torgal's desk. "You are busy?"

"No. It's just a bit of personal writing. What would you like me to do?"

"Would you know Rush's whereabouts?"

"I can have him located." Torgal's eyes swept over David once. "Why don't you take a rest somewhere, and I will send him to you?"

David considered the offer. "It's okay, I will look for him myself."

"If you're prepared to search the length and breadth of the castle. You are aware how he tends to be at the most hard-to-find places."

David chuckled with more genuine amusement than Torgal had heard for a long time. "Oh, I'm well aware of that." He turned on his heels, ready to leave Torgal's study.

"My lord?"

"Yes?"

"Should I assume that this year's summer retreat will be relocated to Eulam?"

"Torgal," David mock frowned, "are you teasing me?"

"Of course not," replied Torgal, although his face said otherwise, "I am only thinking about the preparations."

David just frowned at him some more. "I haven't decided on what to do yet, but don't worry about such things. I intend to let Blocter handle it this time. He's perfectly capable of the task."

That was true. It was time to let go a little, Torgal reminded himself.

"Is there anything else?" David arched an eyebrow, dipping his head ever so slightly so that it was as if he was peering at Torgal at an angle.

Sovani ears pulled back in amazement and embarrassment; this child was getting too good at reading him. "Erm..."

"'Erm'?" David's eyes widened, surprised. "Torgal, did you just say 'erm'?"

Torgal cleared his throat and hid his mortification. "An old friend... Allan... has been in contact recently. He said he's discovered a network of tunnels in Lavafender which have not been recorded anywhere before." He paused. It wasn't a usual request he had and he wasn't sure how to say it. "There's... an invitation."

Silence. David inclined his head when he realised Torgal wasn't going to continue. "Invitation? To visit Lavafender?"

"Yes... an adventure of sorts."

After another moment of silence, David guffawed. It took a while for him to reign in his laughter. "I'm sorry," he said, shaking his head, the lasts of his laughter dying on his lips, "go, Torgal. It's recess, you're entitled to your holiday even if you had hardly taken one in the last eighty-one years."

"Hmm..."

"The rest of the staff can manage things. I will be fine."

"But... the invitation is for both Emmy and me."

"Then all the better. Take her with you." David straightened himself, taking a deep breath. "I'm glad."

"Thank you."

After David left the room, Torgal returned to his writing.

_I hope that one day David will be able to come with us._

 

An old friend. Going on an adventure. Taking Emmy with him. None of these were things David had ever heard from Torgal's lips before. The man was still every bit the sovani general - an idea Athlum might have got used to, but extremely unusual when one stopped and thought about it - but for once he spoke about himself and what he wanted to do. Perhaps he finally considered David mature enough to handle matters without him, or maybe Torgal was finding the balance between being who he was and being part of the society he'd chosen to live in, but either way, when David said he was glad for him, he meant it. From what he knew of the sovanis and of Allan, for Emmy to be invited as well was something exceptional. It was family time the two of them really deserved.

David halted his train of thoughts and chided himself when he realised he was getting envious.

Although he did tell Torgal he would search for Rush himself, David was feeling quite lethargic after the lengthy meetings and so he wandered through the castle's many corridors slowly, his mind drawn back to the day Rush returned to this world.

The first thing Rush wanted to know was where they were. When he found out that he was in David's bedchamber, on the bed, he had laughed and said that was taking things a bit too fast, and he hadn't even removed his shoes yet.

And then he asked what exactly it was David had done that enabled him to return, not accepting "by the sheer force of our wills" as an explanation. David did not answer the question, but Rush figured it out in only a moment.

"It was mine to do as I was pleased with," David had said then.

Still curled on the bed, with David kneeling behind him and bent over him as if to protect him from harm, Rush did his best to meet eyes with David. He was shaking, shocked. David liked this. He liked being able to tell how Rush was feeling. "What gives you the right to make that choice for me?"

"I am a lord. Making decisions is what I do best."

"It's not funny!"

"I'm sorry. It was a selfish decision. If I didn't do that, I wouldn't be able to live with myself."

"Bastard. You call that selfish? How am I gonna live with myself?"

"You live. That's what matters."

It was the first time David saw Rush's eyes redden. In person, not from a visistone. His voice became barely audible. "Goddammit, Dave."

They fell silent then, and David finally moved away when his legs started to go numb; there must be people waiting outside, anxious to see Rush.

They hadn't spoken about it since. In fact, they hadn't spoken very much to each other in the past few days, each with his own life to catch up with. Ministerial recess was far from over, but David had to handle the consequences of Rush's return. Rush's true role in the war was kept a secret between Ghor, Qubine and David, and although the dukes had displayed much trust in David, this was not something he was ready to just count on, nor was he willing to hide Rush away forever.

The talks lasted three days. In the end David was successful, yet he was left with the feeling that the two dukes were going to let him have his way anyway and Ghor only entered the talks as a matter of procedure, and Qubine saw it as a chance to toy with him. In the meanwhile, Rush spent his days in the castle with his family and made himself scarce. Irina was concerned enough to go and explain her brother's behaviour to David, in case he thought Rush was being ungrateful, but David already understood. Family was Rush's priority, the first in Rush's life, and nothing would ever change that. Also, seeing him would only make David feel even more pressured during the discussion.

Now, though, there was nothing he wanted to do more than to see Rush and give him the good news.

But where in the world was Rush?

After asking several people, David headed for his own chambers and spotted Rush just outside the door, clutching a familiar small bag. Seeing David, Rush hid the bag behind him with the subtlety of a charging beastman before pulling a defiant face when David laughed. Swinging the bag of visistones over his shoulder instead, Rush decided not to let David speak first. "You're taking a break?"

David went to his door and opened it. "No, the meeting is over. Would you like to come in, then we can talk about it?" he asked, trying to keep his face neutral, hiding his amusement when Rush's entire body jerked at the news and yet he didn't right away try to ask about the outcome.

Once inside, David shrugged off his jacket and hung it on a chair. Seeing that, Rush put down the bag, perhaps expecting a long talk. The solemn look on Rush's face made David decide against building the suspense any further. He didn't really enjoy toying with anyone's feelings even if it was harmless.

"I have good news for you: Celapaleis and Ghor will not pursue the issue further."

David observed the changes, the way every joint in Rush's body seemed to unlock at the news. Just the look on Rush's face was worth all the hard work. "That means everything's okay? They aren't going to try to kill me or get me locked up?"

"Well, they are not. However," David eyed the bag by Rush's feet, a wry smile stealing its way to his lips. "I might consider having you arrested for theft."

Rush wasn't too amused. "They're mine!"

"They are, and I'm sorry for taking them," David said. "I would have given them back immediately if you'd just told me to. All of them, except for the one that belongs to me."

There was no response. David picked up the bag, found the visistone that had "D" marked on its side and slid it inside the breast pocket of his shirt. Rush's eyes followed every movement, but the rest of him stayed very still, not betraying his thoughts. And when he did finally speak, it wasn't about the contents of that device.

"What's Ghor and Qubine making you do for them?"

David paused for a second, then understood what Rush meant. "They haven't imposed any terms on me or on Athlum. Your freedom is unconditional."

"I'm going to ask them - "

"Rush." David caught Rush's arm when he realised Rush was going to leave right now. "It's true. Check with them if you feel you can't take my word for it, but there is no need to run from my presence."

Eyes set on the door, it took Rush a moment to decide to stay.

"At this point I think we can speak more frankly with each other. Something is making you uncomfortable. What is it?"

Rush turned a little helpless. "You're doing too much for me," he said, suddenly looking like a sad puppy. "You really really don't have to."

"I'm just doing what I want to do."

"But you gave me your - "

"Only the part that Kellendros had already taken away." David smiled. "I haven't really lost anything."

"I... you..." Dark eyes shifted, settling on David's breast pocket as if seeing its contents. "I know what kind of a guy you are. I just... God, Dave, what am I going to do?"

Very slowly, David cocked his head to one side, waiting for Rush to explain what he meant.

"Look, I know what's done is done and I can say thanks to you a million times and I still won't feel that's enough. But I know. You always try to repay people and you felt guilty about something I decided to do and you've lost friends and family and a girl you'd loved, so you wanted to do something for me. And I'm so glad to see you again. Even if you'd left me there I honestly would've been happy. You shouldn't have given me your soul. It's the best gift, it's priceless and I... but..."

As Rush's voice trailed off and his eyes lowered to the floor, David walked closer, into Rush's personal space, but Rush took half a step back at the same time. He didn't agree with most of what Rush said but he was going to let him finish first. "Calm down."

Rush nodded; he was trying. He didn't seem confused, just sad. "Why don't you give me back that visistone?"

Having heard what Rush said earlier, this didn't startle David. "Was it not made for me?"

"You've done far too much for me already. What I did back then was my own choice and you shouldn't have let that and what I said on the visistone make you feel you have to help me or be with me. I don't want you to feel like you have to return my feelings. That's just not right."

The words nearly made David laugh just as much as they nearly made him sigh. Yes, perhaps things did seem that way to Rush. David had never confessed his feelings, never showed any reaction when Rush eluded that he was seeing Nora. Three days ago when Rush returned, David didn't explain why he wouldn't have been able to live with himself if he chose to leave Rush in that space between their world and Veyriel. And then Rush found out that David had seen the visistone that ought to have been destroyed. To anyone's eyes, it must seem like it was guilt, pity, and the desperate need to save someone after so many had been taken away, that drove David to do what he did. And now, somehow, David knew there was nothing he could say that could convince Rush otherwise. It would all just sound like lies.

Lies they had been telling each other all this time when the truth was right in front of them.

When it came to matters of the heart, actions spoke louder than words.

So David gave up on the lies, and on the words that could be misunderstood as lies, stepped forward and let action speak for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story didn't turn out anything like I wanted it to be when I started, but I wanted to finish it anyway. ._. Sorry it's not very good, hope you enjoyed it anyway.


End file.
